Complications (In Progress)

As i said before, i just write as the scenes appear in my head. The story might appear all over the place, but i'm just posting for some feedback.

Complications
 
We had reached his car now. He searched for his keys and when he couldn’t find it in his front jean pocket, his hands patted every inch of his body frantically; I watched grinning mockingly: he looked like a lost puppy.
 “I hope you didn’t leave it in the car,” I said and I pressed my lips together, holding back another laugh.
 “No, don’t say that,” he said in a panicky tone. We peered through the front window of his Audi, but the keys weren’t there. Then I heard jingling.
 “Ah, found it,” he said pulling it out of his front jean pocket.
 “Didn’t you look there first?” I said my smile never fading. He rolled his eyes and stuck his tongue out at me.
 “You’re hopeless,” I said shaking my head. He chuckled and pulled at my ponytail causing my heart rate to quicken. He opened the door for me, the gentleman quality never got old; I was about to get in but he never moved. He leaned against the car; his right elbow propped on top the roof, his left hand outstretched holding the door; his body blocking almost the entire front seat. My eyebrows pulled together as I looked at him. How was I supposed to get in? Did he expect me to pass under his arm? He stared at me his eyes teasing in a sort of come hither look, his eyebrows nudged upward slightly and his full lips pressed together.
 “Well,” he said, his eyes glanced at the front seat then back to me. I sighed and bit my lower lip. The sun’s sparkle hit him in all the right places, he looked like he was in a car commercial; he definitely had the features for it, from his rugged facial stubble, to his slightly scruffy golden brown hair, and the radiant gray that encircled his jade irises. I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks; my pores tingled. He was teasing me and I liked it…a lot.
I heard a car drive into the lot behind me and his eyes wandered away from mine following its course. Must be some sort of hot, drool worthy car. But he stiffened suddenly; the smirk evaporated, his posture was now army-like. I turned my head to the direction that caught his attention. A woman I had never met before had just pulled up in a red convertible. After a month of visiting, I thought I had known the faces of everyone on set by now. I guessed she was just a visitor like me, but she looked too movie star-ish.
    ​She got out of the car and stood across from us, about fifteen feet more or less. She was conversing with Brunner, who ran to open her door; how attentive these movie stars were. She was laughing jubilantly at something he must have said. She wasn’t very tall; her stilettos elevated her at least four inches, without them she’d maybe be eye level with me, give or take a centimetre. Her skin was fair and toned; it looked silky to the touch. Her sunglasses were worn as a headband on her thick, long light, butterscotch hair that was layered and flowed down to the middle of her back. Her lips were coloured in burgundy, a light pink blush brushed her cheekbones and a soft lavender eye shadow tinted her eye lids. She wore black skinny jeans and a purple a-symmetrical top. She couldn’t be more than thirty five years old; she was stunning.
​I looked away and glanced back at Adam, he was still gawking in her direction. There was a wanting in his eyes and he seemed to concentrate very hard on his movements. I saw him look down and adjust his shirt a couple times, and combed his hair back, away from his face with his fingers. As I stood there, my face pallid, drained of all bliss, my heart throbbed as my mind worked over time, trying to understand what it was that had him so fidgety. I looked in her direction again. Brunner was babbling, his mouth moving at a vast speed, but her eyes were fixated on Adam. She smiled at him in a lustful manner.  
 ​What was this? Words forming ridiculous questions swirled in my head and burst into a raging river. Did they share a close relationship? Was she a sort of… mentor? How long did he know her? Did he ever kiss her the way I always dreamed of him kissing me? As I processed the words I realised how naïve I sounded. Of course she was more than a friend; she meant something to him; I didn’t want think of that; but each question was like a drop of poison that formed into an instant headache.
     ​I stared at him now, bewildered. He was smiling, that beautiful boyish smile I loved so much, and it was directed at her. My brain swelled in my head and I couldn’t focus. Then a buzzing tapped at my eardrums making me flinch and I was immediately alert.
Adam took out his cell phone, read the text message and smiled widely. His eyes looked up and found her again. I felt my heart rip a little inside my chest as my eyes followed and I saw her placing a thin cell phone into her back pocket. Brunner had disappeared, she was standing alone. My mouth turned dry and I tried to swallow, but it was like trying to force sand down my throat.
   “I’ll be right back,” he said without looking at me. His cheeks were high and blushed. He walked quickly but steadily across to her; my heart stung against my ribs and my hand unconsciously grabbed at my chest. I stood there motionless, watching as he approached her, he was still smiling, but her smile left her face as he stood in front of her; she was serious now, almost angry. It was like a tease; a ruse to get him to come over to her, but he didn’t seem to catch that, he was still giddy like a five year old finding his favourite misplaced toy.
Maybe I had judged wrong.
    ​ I lifted myself onto the hood of the car and let my legs dangle; I looked innocent enough and not like I was practising surveillance.
Adam gazed into her eyes and reached for her hand but she pulled away, causing his smile to retract. She looked around with swift eyes, as if searching for any sign that someone was watching. She saw no one. Then her head turned to my direction. She stared at me, her face hard, her eyes cold, but still breathtakingly beautiful. I realised at that moment that I was no where near her exquisite exterior. Her strawberries and cream complexion, full lips and runway model physique, could make any normal girl question her self esteem; and that’s just the category I fell in normal, there was no way I could compete with that.
My heart swelled with bloody tears.
   ​Her hard eyes scorched my face and my breathing became suddenly rapid. I pressed my teeth into my lower lip and looked down as blood rushed to my head causing my temples to throb. I felt like I was back in school and caught cheating on a test by my teacher.
After a few hour-long seconds, the anxiety pricked at my nerves like tiny pins; I had to look. I peeked without lifting my head; she wasn’t looking anymore. I safely raised my head to look at them again. My eyes narrowed, focusing hard, hoping it would improve my hearing somehow. I felt uneasy; my heart rate could power a jet plane.
     ​They were a little further away now, about five feet further. It seems she wanted to ensure that I didn’t hear a word. She was talking; her lips moved slowly like she was consoling him. I looked at Adam, his face turned sombre. I bit my nails at the suspense; curiosity was digging its claws into my skin. I had to know what she was saying to him, but I couldn’t hear anything! I only deciphered what I could from their expressions.
 ​She raised her hand to stroke his arm. Her face was soft now; almost sad. His head was down and he was shaking it intently. Then his lips moved, and she retracted her hand like a reflex. His eyes met hers again and they stared at each other in silence for a long minute; her eyes wide with shock, his soft, tender with… love? Love! My heart stung harder, awaking the lion. It hurt to watch now, but I couldn’t stop. She turned to walk away, but he caught her hand and pulled her back.
 “No Adam!” I heard her shout. She whipped her hand out of his and her hair flipped recklessly as she turned sharply this time, her stilettos digging into the gravel with every step she took away from him.
    ​Adam stood there, planted to that spot for what seemed like ages. I hopped down from the hood and leaned against his car; my hands were still pressed against the fender afraid that if I let go I’d collapse. She had broken his heart, this much I knew.
His face was white, drained of its blood. How could she be so callous to do it here, like this? My strength resurfaced as rage surged inside me; I would give anything to throw-down with her right now. But my thoughts were quieted when I saw him walking towards me. My heart whimpered as he looked at me. I smiled but the edge of his mouth just twitched slightly. Her words hit him like boulders, she had crippled his smile. He walked around the car without a word and opened the driver’s door. I quickly walked to my door, still ajar, and slid in. He slammed his door as he got in and I did the same with mine. I didn’t know if I should say something idiotic to break the silence or if I should just leave it as is and give him sometime to recuperate. He started the engine and I decided on the second option.
 ​ We arrived at my house some time later, the silence still raw in the air. I held the door handle and glanced at him for the fiftieth time since we left. His face held the same agonising expression. He cut the engine, then leaned back resting his head on the seat to face the ceiling, his eyes closed. He breathed out deeply and I felt his pain seep out his pores and transfer to me; it drilled into the core of my soul. I wanted so much to touch him; to console him; to hold his face between my hands, look deeply into his eyes and tell him that I’m here, I love you. But that seemed so far away now; my feelings had to be placed on the back burner for now; I sent them to the dungeons at the pit of my stomach and threw away the key. ​
I looked out the window at my house, my hand gripping the handle tighter. I didn’t want to leave him but I had to. I turned to say goodbye, but he was already getting out. I flinched as he slammed the door, but the lion purred in my heart. I opened my door and he came over and held it open for me with a half hearted smile appearing on his face. I got out and he shut the door behind me.
   ​We walked side by side to my front door while I fiddled through my purse for my keys. I finally found it hidden beneath my cell phone. I opened the door and a feeling of comfort rushed through me. Adam’s presence is usually a reverie; but today was a roller coaster ride I couldn’t wait to get off. I set my purse on the kitchen counter and finally broke the silence.
 “Are you hungry?” I said turning to face him. He was sitting on the couch, his elbows propped on his knees, his head bent down locked in a tight grip between his hands. I hated seeing him like this; I felt so helpless. He didn’t respond. I slowly walked over to the couch and sat next to him. My heart rate accelerated and the lion growled; please…shut up! I exhaled deeply and it slowed a little; it was bearable enough to talk to him.
   “Adam?” I whispered. Again the urge to touch him was eating at my nerves; I clasped my hands together interlocking my fingers, taking every precaution to avoid temptation. He sighed and his hands twitched a little. He never changed his position. I decided that I should give him some space and just keep myself busy in the kitchen; he’s always hungry anyways, so he’ll eat whatever I make. I think there are a few pieces of chicken in the freezer; fried chicken sounds good, with maybe noodles and mixed vegetables as a side…      
   “Aren’t you going to ask me who she is?” I gasped when he finally spoke, but he didn’t snicker at my unsteady nervous system; I think he was used to it by now, or maybe too depressed to find my faults humorous anymore.
I looked at him; his poignant eyes were fixed on me, piercing an invisible hole into my irises. His elbows still rested on his thighs but his fingers weren’t hidden in his forest of hair anymore, but loosely intertwined out in front of him. I searched for liquid to swallow but my mouth was parched, I swallowed anyway and regretted it; my throat was burning now. I didn’t want to know who she was, I could put two and two together couldn’t I.
  “Um…well I just figured she was your friend,” I choked out, my eyes finding interest in the silver ring on my left middle finger, which I bought ten years ago and never took off; anything to not look into those suffering eyes. I could feel the heat from his glare on my face. I knew he was going to tell me what I didn’t want to hear; thinking of it was hard enough, but hearing it from his mouth would be infinite torment.
 “She’s more than just a friend, well at least she was,” he said in a hoarse whisper. So I had guessed right; the unbearable thought flew into my head again. I didn’t want to hear anymore; my pulse was raging in my veins.
 “Her name is Elizabeth,” he continued not hearing my silent screams for mercy. “We met on set three months ago and it was kind of like love at first sight… for me anyways.” The lion roared with agony at the sound of the word; my heart thrashed behind my rib cage as its claws gashed deep wounds into it. Stop…stop please; but my silent cries were drowned out by my comforting tones.
   “I’m sorry. I could see it in your eyes that she means a lot to you.” With utmost strength, I slowly rested my hand gently on his. “She’ll come around and realise how stupid she was.” He took my hand and sandwiched it between his, which ignited a fierce fire from my fingertips to my toes.
 
 
 
 
 
“I should go,” he said. I wanted to ask him to stay, but he didn’t belong to me; I meant nothing more than a friend to him; I wasn’t the one who made his face light up like a kid in a candy store; he loved someone else; his heart belonged to someone else. He walked towards the door; the lion thrashed in my chest, but my face portrayed a façade: a quiet expressionless mouse.
     “Drive safely,” I said choking out each word, my voice was almost inaudible. It was surprising he heard.
      “Thanks. I will,” he replied. It seems like I was putting on a good show; I should win an Oscar for this- Best Female Actor- ‘She looked at him; he saw eyes that were comforting, secure and nothing of the passion and the fire burning through the one way glass.’
He opened the door and walked out onto the front porch; I followed holding the door open. The tears began to simmer as I faced his back. I gripped the door handle and it shook in motion with my unsteady hand. I couldn’t stand the pain of watching him walk away from me, so I closed my eyes; the memory of his back was already stamped into my brain. ​
I began closing the door walking with it till I reached the frame, then the sound of his footsteps stopped. I opened my eyes. He was standing on the third and final step. I opened the door wider and forced a smile.
   “Sweet dreams,” he said with a quiet smile. My throat was ablaze, my face flushed with the heat. Did he want me to drop dead right here? His eyes narrowed, his head cocked to one side in bewilderment, his smile a little vague now. He opened his mouth…
    “You too,” I said before he could talk. My voice sounded hoarse like I swallowed saw dust. His forehead scrunched, his eyes were closer together now, the smile dropped to a frown. I swallowed hard. Oh no! The heat was melting my façade; soon my true emotions would be exposed. He turned his body to face mine; the toe of his shoe itching toward the second step. My eyes were wide. No! He can’t know it would ruin everything; I can’t risk this friendship. I sucked in a deep breath, quickly said goodnight and shut the door.
       ​He didn’t move. He lingered on the steps a few seconds, then I heard his footsteps descend; his car door slammed a few seconds after then, his engine turned over and I heard the car drive away. I peeped through the window… he was gone.