Her Love will last forever

The dark hides your face,

But she still loves you,

She can't look into your eyes,

But it's all where she wants to be,

She loves to spend time with you,

And hates it when she has to leave,

She listens to your music,

And trys her best to like them for you,

She says your words, over and over,

In her mind, and out loud,

Your quotes live with her,

And never leave her brain,

She let you sleep, in her arms

And looked over you while your dreams,

Progressed and lifted your heart,

She will love you until the end,

And has from the start,

She has a heart of gold,

And it will never be broken,

If it even gets

A tiny bit sratched,

She's my best mate,

Watch your back...

(loads shotgun >:D)

Author's Note

Not too long after writing this poem, My friend and her boyfriend broke up :/
But I'm not deleting this because It's a good poem and me and her both like it :)

Reviews

[.shalynn.009.]

I loved the ending of this, adn the progression up to it. I really liked how you talked about her, focusing on how she tries to do things for the one being spoken to, about how everything is a struggle for her, and her life is consumed by him, yet how it makes her happy. And then the switch into talking about what the speaker will do, and speaker's relationship with her, was unexpected and a great way to wrap it up. I did think this could be broken up into stanzas, broken up to put emphasis on specific lines or words, but I liked the loose rhyme scheme, without a strict structure. It made the rhythm of this poem really easy to read and not cliche with the usual ABAB or AABB.

Good write and thank you for the RR. You're quite talented for only being fifteen, and very creative. It's nice to read something from a teenager that isn't about teen love. Not that there's anything wrong with teen love, but this was much more interesting and entertaining to read. Keep writing.

[Ravyne Hawke]

Great poem Jenny with an awesome twist at the end.

[Linear]

What a twist lol.....but even without that it was a good poem, I just love Love poems dont you? :O)

[misha]

Very sweet and I love the end. I would be the same for my bestfriend =)

[Chris Smith Welshpoetcs]

True friendship.

[Maggie]

Look out for your friend girly, and take care of her! ;)

[Katub]

too good for words

[Katub]

[An owl on the moon]

A truly wondrous dedication.. a lifting write that shares the beauty of one who is a true friend... one we wish we could all know and have a part of our lives.

[Cerebriation]

Quite unique write. I love the mystery throughout. And the personification of the shotgun is wonderful. Well penned, lovely write!