The Whisper

I’m pretty sure I’m dying, but I really don’t mind

While there’s nothing to look forward to,

I leave nothing behind.

The whispers say I’m dying, and I’m compelled to believe

For the whispers seem to know a lot,

Why not know when I’ll leave?

Besides, I’m not afraid to die, at least its something new

It really has become hard these days

To find something to do.

 

I sure hope when I die that the whispers make it fun.

Otherwise it’s not worth the effort

To let this body run.

I asked the whispers, sang to their Lord

But answers, he offered none,

So I might just take this life now,

Here, beneath the sun.

 

I asked him if that was okay,

The whisper said nothing,

But I suppose if he had much to say

Then he would have said something.

 

And it takes a minute for me to understand

Before I find the humour,

Oh the whisper- what a man!

He would never kill her.

And as I raise the knife in my hand,

I laugh- oh, would I ever!-

And I call to the skies,

“Oh, Whisper, aren’t you clever!”

Author's Note

I was having fun writing fu stuff.
Tell me if you get it~ (;

Reviews

[The Great Brain]

This seems a bit....deep. From what I can tell, (I could be wrong, so please don't get mad at me if I don't get it) it's about a suicidal person listening to the whispers of his/her own mind, questioning if they should kill themselves or not. Kind of like arguing with themselves, the person vs. the whisper (the part of them in their mind that wants to die). I had to read it a few times to start to kind of see which direction it was going in, but in my opinion, that's a good thing. I love writing where you just don't pick it up at the first glance. When it doesn't make sense the first time, it forces you to read it again, picking up any clues you missed on what it could all mean. Great job!

[Sylvana]

I don't get it. You should explain it to me.
Weeeeeeeeeell then, I liked the rhyming and how you don't tell the reader everything, so they have to interpret on their own. I also love the theme of it.
I love you. ;D

[xx_strawberry_xx]

Really interesting poem. I actually had to read the whole thing twice, to try to understand the meaning of it.
I'm not sure if i really get it either, but what I'm thinking is that The Whisper would never tell the girl to kill herself, but instead convince her to kill herself without saying anything to the girl at all.

It was really written well. You managed to tell the story while rhyming beautifully. I think you're really good at writing this type of poem, its amazing how you sort of let the reader interpret the meaning themselves instead of giving the meaning away. Anyway, great job! I loved it :)

[xxxrawr_friendxxx]

...I don't get it... Lol maybe I'm just being stupid. XD But it sounds like the whisper is getting her to try to kill herself, instead of him killing her... I dunno. X3