Penitent

Thank you Richard for your support and suggestions on my sonnets ... :)

P E N I T E N T

The chains, long forged, from dark, persistent paths

of blackened rock that smothers golden fields …

Akin to dragon's caldron swirling wraths

red scallion plates so thickly plied to shield.

Youth's steady stream of brazen, hot desires

as sunset looms on spent horizon's line

to steady reins of stallion's pulsing fires;

thus, rising bright, a new celestial sign …

Releasing now, imprisoned for so long,

the true and lasting Heaven's ringing call

in ageless joy of spirits sung in Psalms …

if one but trusts the Star of David's laud.

A rose forgiven each it's hoary thorns;

and thus made perfect, halos now adorn.

Author's Note

Reviews

[andrew mitchell]

A fine write Gene but sadly the world is in bad shape at present. So much anger and violence everywhere. Staying safe seems to be on the agenda more so each coming year.

[Einstein Noodle]

anger and violence and more .. enough sins to tip the scales against us all eh!? love is the answer my brother .. and Heaven lay beyond the grave .. i am hopeful ... our human history is fraught with the things the world is going through and much worse .. :( ...... i don't think the world can turn, my friend .. but you and i can eh!? if we choose :)
E.

[Lorry]

And as if a new(ish) write from you Sir Noodle aren't reason enough to celebrate, may I wish you an almost end to that year from hell that thought playing games and messing with our heads so much that some might actually welcome trump back, for purely selfish reasons of knowing its easier to watch the idiot that doesn't realise he's an idiot!
I do so hope 2024 brings you happiness E, with plenty more inspiration added, so your words have time to bake and set fully, before unleashing them onto us.
😊

[Einstein Noodle]

thanks Lorry ... there is a hope and joy that has nothing to do with our politics and confusing sometimes fearful world ... i just look at the lilies of the fields and how wonderfully they are clothed ... to plagerize one way better than i ;) thanks so much for reviewing .. taking time ... best of the day to ya .. and an exciting adventurous new year .. with many pleasant surprises
E.

[Cherrie Palmer]

I love the progression of thought- growing maturing and discovering the true treasure of life.

[Einstein Noodle]

oh my dear mon Cherrie!!! so happy you found me back ... right here at the Cafe' ... your walking my spaces is dear to me ... i need to catch up :) .. thank you for your review .. encouragement and presence ... here at the Cafe'
E.

[Chris Shaw]

Your final couplet is so moving Mr E.

The stuff of youth plays on your conscience as you age. Yes, plenty of time for reflection once we have matured and in our latter years. Plenty of time to delve into what we consider sinful. And everyone of us is guilty of sin.

Christianity is based on forgiveness and I am reminded here of how forgiving Christ was/is

A wonderful poem.

Merry Christmas.

Chris 🎄

[Einstein Noodle]

yes! Jesus teaches the greatest of these (gifts) is love ... first of our Father Creator and then to our neighbors as we love ourselves .. and so loving one's self in all our imperfections is a prerequisite eh!? Thank you so much for the visit, Chris .. means a lot ot me :) as for what we consider sin ... it's pretty well set forth, in my opinion .. it is not a subjective thing .. but objective fact ... what applies in our spiritual life .. applies in the material world ... we look inside and find out don't we?! very healthy and joy filled Christmas day and New Year to you, dear friend
E.

[Aneto]

What an incredible poem! Masterfully crafted, thank you! If I may take a guess as to the inspiration... Is it not a scene from The Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis? That particular vignette was my favorite part of the book, I must say. :)

~Aneto~

[Einstein Noodle]

i am not familiar with the C.S. Lewis referenced but will check it out .. the inspiration??? mmmmmm just wanting to put it to a sonnet form ... a stubborn truth about all human kind .. we are in need and can find redemption .. become better people that the Creator means us to be ... peace and joy my new friend .. again.. thank you for taking time
E.

[FGFRANKLIN]

Every new generation disregards the lessons taught by the older one. Thus, we remain collectively and eternally stupid as a species. Ignorance would be forgivable but the young could know if they would listen. They live in denial or rush headlong into the social atmosphere, burning like meteors to their demise. I'm reminded of ee cummings' poem, old age sticks. If we survive long enough and are honest with ourselves I think we all have some regrets. But we can learn from our mistakes or simply brood over them. I much prefer the former as a course of action. Being of a contrite spirit is humbling but there is wisdom to be gained in such humility and forgiveness, both for self and others. I enjoyed the read. F.

[Einstein Noodle]

yes! there is much to be learned from our mistakes and misgivings .. wisdom, it seems, is not bound for our youthful years .. we gain it from suffering consequences .. and if, as you say, we are honest ... we can find peace, assurance and the forgiveness we all need. love on ya brother .. thanks so much for reading and reviewing ... means a lot to me
E.

[Tamara Beryl Latham]

Your poetic ability leaves me speechless and this poem is deserving of some type of front page award. The couplet speaks volumes and the sonnet itself trumpeting halos, as rewards for the sinful mistakes of our youth, forces the reader to realize we will all eventually return to our heavenly Father for the final judgment. Great sonnet and one to be savored, as a fine wine. Thanks for posting. :-)

[Einstein Noodle]

ohhhhhhh thank you so very much, Tamara .. i am deeply gratified and humbled by your review .. you heard all that i intended in the poem .. bless you and thank you again for taking time
E.

[Tamara Beryl Latham]

You're welcome. I won't be posting for a while, so thought I'd add a reply to your poem. Have a wonderful holiday. :-)

[Neville]

I can only imagine the feeling of sheer relief one might experience upon satisfactorily relieving oneself of the heavy burden his or her collective sins weighed upon a conscience desperate for absolution .. fortunately my conscience is clear .. but I do believe that guilt is the most destructive of all human emotions with jealousy coming a close second .. I also believe that to feel the kind of catharsis I refer to, one must first truly own their individual grief or sorrow for their own misdoings .. I was kidding by the way when I suggested I am guilty of nothing .. but then, you knew that already, didn't you Gene .. Neville

[Einstein Noodle]

there are plenty of human emotion and thought that are plagues upon their victims .. false guilt is certainly a huge one ... greed and avarice ... envy and jealousy .. hate and violence ... all devils in disguise, says i .. i think you hit the wisdom button when you say we all must first come to terms with "self" ... brutal honesty neccessary .. love your review, Sir ... i am very grateful for your interacting with my poem and thoughts .. love love love :)
E.

[Neville]

they are of course what make us distinctly human .. & back at ya E :))) N.

[Einstein Noodle]

yes ... born in need ..........

[Stella Armour]

" a new celestial sign …"
As we age we think more deeply and discover ourselves more deeply, it is one of the last steps to full maturity i think.
The mis-spent youth was only us testing the boundaries, then we made the boundaries and now we dont need them because we are so self contained that we are at one with the universe and will return home after going full circle..... Just my thoughts E about penitence and self discovery and forgiving ourselves for what was only enjoying the seeds of life breaking free.

[Einstein Noodle]

oh my dear Stella! .. yep! .. all i can say is yep and yes to your review .. i think you feel me dahlink! so ironic; the energy of youth wasted on the material world .. worry ... insecurities and such blustering bumblings :))))))))))) we are fortunate to be were we are tho eh!? love on ya .. and thanks for taking time on my little streets .. right here at the Cafe'
E.

[Stella Armour]

I enjoy it when poems make me THINK, so thank you for the mind exercise E ..... :)

[Lisasview]

Hi there,
I know, I know... where have I been...well, life just took over and my days have been full...
You are the first I am reading here after such a very long break.
Now this is so very different from all the others I have read of yours in the past.
I have now and enjoyed the read three times...
The music is wonderful... Reminds me of my years singing in a coral group...
Lisa...Lisasview

[Einstein Noodle]

i guess we two are resurrected about the same time, Lisa! I also have been laid low with the whims of creative spark .. i turn to classic forms when my dry spell expands too long ... thank you for stopping on my street first of all .. i really feel honored .. humbled ... plus .. you read it three times ... so grateful .. love, joy and abundance my friend and a very blessed celebration of Christmas .. my Lord's birth
E.

[Lisasview]

Hi there,
Glad to reconnect... but now I will be away from the computer as I am going to have a knee replacement on Jan.3
Years of running caught up with me!!
Lisa

[Einstein Noodle]

time and gravity kills the knees for sure .. keeping you in my thoughts and prayers for successful surgery and complete, speedy recovery ..