Touch

Touch

ebony hair ablaze with shine

in the daylight

a waterfall cascade of starbright

this   patterned index started with

ridges as the Saw toothed Mountains 

that nick smokey clouded heights and

sweeps misted valleys

hollow walls make spaces for souls and 

demons just as easily

our luggage packed haphazard

 ...... willy nilly in 

frenzied, chaotic dancing wisps

stuffed between soft, brown, leather lids

zippered shut

 

private intricacies squeezed between lips 

clicked shutter tight

 .............. pictures that captured and

freyed sayings much over done

the weight loads one shoulder 

then; another beyond balance 

winding about the neck

like cobwebs

                                       hanging            and             dangling

          at odd angles 

touching

E.

02/14/2022

Author's Note

Reviews

[Mike Keenan]

Not sure about the need for first three stanzas, but I do like saw toothed mountains so yes, a ponderous picture of heavy issues sealed in Pandora's boxes. I like the rhythm, form and the way that you typically go for broke as in the golfer's lament - never up; never in!

[Einstein Noodle]

thanks so much for your honesty my new found friend .. not a golfer so haven't heard to phrase ... but i like it ... more brings to mind my present love life tho :))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) not to be concerned for me tho .. i am old and past all that nonsense ...not! ;) ... sorry the V1-3 failed to touch you .... but i love your review!
E.

[Lisasview]

I find it interesting to read a poem with no punctuation.. This means I need to take my breath where it leads me..
The moving up, down and sideways with your lines is wonderful and feels like a sort of puncuation..
So so different..love it..

[Einstein Noodle]

i'm happy you put up with it Lisa! :) i pretty much stopped using punctuation in my poetry years ago .. tho i do sometimes us it with classic forms .. i just found it to be too restrictive and a lot of times i was simply not educated enough to use it properly .. for a while i tried a mix but eventually gave up on punctuation for me ;) thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts on this one .. means a lot you know ... right here at the Cafe' ;)
E.

[Lisasview]

Yes, it does mean a lot to get reviews on this site...many do not review at all...I am learning who they are..
I did not have to put up with anything as I really liked your poem.
I am spending quite bit of time taking my poems off line and reworking them..I am finally happy with my last reworking on Hand-In-Hand..and on Time..two down and several more to go..

[Einstein Noodle]

sounds like a daunting effort! I will have to look for Hand in Hand!

[Lisasview]

First one I ever submitted ..anywhere...
Thank you for looking..

[Soren]

This takes a great deal of thought to untangle. I loved the last part starting with "frayed sayings much overdone" Most poetic.

[Einstein Noodle]

thanks for looking into it's meaning for yourself! I really appreciate it. abstract is not for everyone but it is my most comfortable/natural "voice" ... thank you for pointing to what spoke to you .. it helps
E.

[Soren]

most welcome

[William Michael Reeves]

I feel like I just went on a hike. And your awkward load kept shifting around in my brain as I walked behind you trying to catch up and you intentionally let me pass you throwing my own load off balance. Then I read it a couple more times and found that if we tied each other together with cobwebs for safety I didn't have to worry about falling over the waterfall and end up captured by the demons living in the cave behind it. Whew!! Thanks for saving me from your poetry!

[Einstein Noodle]

ahahahaha well ... glad i could be of help .. being tied up by cobwebs, however kind the one tied to doesn't sound like a pleasant experience .. thanks so much for taking time and to read several times is one of the nicest encouragements for me ...
E.

[AMMD]

Your imagery and eloquent connotative energy flow nicely throughout. Great write and read

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you for stopping by AMMD! glad you found something of value for your effort ;)
E.

[AMMD]

I did. Thank you and you’re welcome. Nice to “meet” you :)

[Einstein Noodle]

and nice to meet you too!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

the cobwebs, memories that hang in our minds like those in an attic of past loves...
this is beautiful, E.
you are such a master writer...odd angles don't seem so odd when you write about them.
j.

[Einstein Noodle]

your revue is very encouraging for me sir .. i appreciate all the support you have given me, sharing your poetry here at the Cafe' and taking time for mine when they come out ... much respect sir! so glad you felt this one
E.

[Unspoken poet]

Love that ending, how you formed that like this was so unique as well,
This was beautiful yet sad as well. nicely written

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you from my heart Ms Poet. thank you for taking time to read and review .. i especially appreciate you point out what spoke to you .. it helps :)
E.

[Pete]

wow, that's some touch. very cool write - one of my favorites of yours. imagery so strong along with emotive word choices. the dangling cobwebs at the end adding the icing on the cake. terrific accompanying song as well. all around great job. me likes ... :)

[Einstein Noodle]

alright Sir Pete! we connected!! i'm really happy about that my friend! thank you for reviewing!
read morealright Sir Pete! we connected!! i'm really happy about that my friend! thank you for reviewing!
E.

[Cherrie Palmer]

No fluff. Just images that blend with emotions that are teethered to conflicting bursts of joy and loss. Of empty spaces that refuse to be filed.
Very powerful

[Einstein Noodle]

such a perceptive and sensitive read Cherrie! thank you for reviewing .. best of the day to ya! ;)
E.

[Cherrie Palmer]

Thank you Gene
Still working on the tk?

[Einstein Noodle]

what is the tk? .. i am a bit ignorant dahlink. :)

[Cherrie Palmer]

Sorry tk is truck :)

[Patricia Wedel]

dear E... since this is written on Valentines Day... I am "touched" by your words of memories.. "a water cascade of Starbright" and "dancing wisps"...
Love lingers in the Forest where Dreams Rest under Evergreen trees...
We had a Quiet Valentines Day Thinking about the Bluebirds with Apricot Breasts.. fluttering on branches outside our upstairs Window. it seemed to be an Omen of an Early Spring. tenderly, Pat

[Einstein Noodle]

and who doesn't luv an early Spring?? Happy Valentines Day my friend .. Beauregard and I spent the day on our walk, me to the gym and he sleeping till I returned ;) I see you looking out that window ... what a blessing
E.

[Patricia Wedel]

I wish I could have snapped a photo or Video.. I plan to place a Bluebird Nesting Wooden Box in our Back Yard soon.. my daughter lives 50 miles South in Virginia.. and their Daffodils are blooming.. even with a bit of Snow last week. Luv… Pat

[Einstein Noodle]

I just looked out the window and saw the daffodils behind the car port are bloomed out!! So exciting eh!? Good luck with your bluebird box. We had a couple that stayed two years in a row .. at least I imagine them to be the same ones ;)

[John the Baptist]

Baggage is a symbol of memories and cobwebs hint of passing time. Such things weigh heavily on both the shoulders and the soul.

[Einstein Noodle]

yes they can, can't they, John? thanks for taking time to read and review .. makes us quite human eh!? ;)
E.