Grace ?

Grace ?

A Poem by Einstein Noodle
"

a hymn form poem

"
Image result for dead love
compliments of pinterest 

Grace ?

the tree was hung in winter ice
the day his head bent low
his heart would fail and pay a price
for love, from her, bestowed

upon a newly wedded lock
he used a damaged key
inside a place so deep it mocked
the warmth of spring's decree

she tried in vain to reach his mind
of oaken wood so dense
her own fair ferns curled up at night
to hide in heart's defense

she couldn't bridge the walls of steel
and roots so thickly held
in earth and rock and misery
bequeathed through lines of elde

she found his heart with soul and quil
she dipped in barb'd wire tears
and pierced his skull with grit and drill
revealing all she feared.
E.
02/15/2021

© 2021 Einstein Noodle


Author's Note

Einstein Noodle
https://youtu.be/3maGHyt_xOU
Emily Dickenson used the hymn form to "rebel" against a starchy society .. said to be one of those poets who were at the vanguard of Modernism. I think her "rebellion" was subtle as she used slight alterations in rhythm and stretched rhyme here and there. Hymn poetry were meant to be sung in Church and so she used theme to make her statements as well. I read that the form should be able to be sung to any worship tune you please. Like "Amazing Grace" for instance. I hope you like my little hymn form tale
E.

My Review

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Featured Review

einstein.... a fantastic write!!! 👍 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
well done, & I can understand it too, amazing 😀
(except the word 'elde' couldn't find it in any dictionary when I googled it. (i do know it's a river in germany.)
please do write more of this more narrative style, rhyming or not, instead of those unrelated random thoughts posing as free verse poetry. i know it takes a bit more time & effort in drafting & editing many times, but it's worth it.
you've made my day E.
cheerio carola

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Einstein Noodle

2 Years Ago

why thank you young lady .. i would take a different position on my "other random thoughts posing..... read more
Einstein Noodle

2 Years Ago

ps. elde simply means the eldest and in this poem i mean it to reflect a lineage of thick headed and.. read more



Reviews

I do love this piece.. both the meter and the message.. the damaged key made me think of love on the rebound. at my age I have met many in their second and even multiple dips in the inkwell.. someone once described it as dealing with buttons that someone else had installed.. well done..

Posted 3 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

ooooo what a review .. should be a poem in itself .. certainly a lot of material in that experience .. read more
Dear E, such depths to this poem! As always, magnificent piece...the levels and layers to this are astounding. How often does one become hard as tree bark in the face of such things and what lies underneath that...your poetry makes me think E. Love the dark quality within this, my kinda poem...be well my friend :)

Posted 3 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

ohhhhhhhhhh yes .. there is the darkness isn't there ... needs be broken through but most assuredly .. read more
Woah this is woven in deep sublime metaphor, many men's minds are dense like oak as to the sentiments of their women i guess. This was intense and awesomely expressed in classic style rhyme that i enjoy so much. Kudos!

Plz do read and comment my newest poem too .

Posted 3 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

i will check that out S ......... thank you for taking time and your positive review .. i agree .. m.. read more
Such true poetry here with meter and rhyme Gene, nice work, great story telling. The first time ive read this style of yours like a period type poem all worldly of an era gone by.

Posted 3 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

now my friend ..that is a perfect review as those were the things I aimed at ... as you know any for.. read more
andrew mitchell

3 Years Ago

I must be good! I sure can pick em! Figjam says I
Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

yes.... you must be! :))))))))))))))))))))))))
This has a legendary feel to me. Or it did before I read your notes. Preferring to see my own meanings. After reading your notes my view didn't change as to how good this is.

Posted 3 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

that would be an 'ell of a deal to ruin a poem with an author's note :))))))))))) thanks buddy! glad.. read more
Ken Simm.

3 Years Ago

You are more than welcome. got my first two weeks ago next is at the end of next month.
Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

fantastic .. my small populated, large area County had just 10 active cases last week ... being reti.. read more
Gene, this is what the writing site is all about. I love what you've done and the background you have fronted us. Excellent poem and information I will be reading more about this on lunch today.

Posted 3 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

Pizza? :)
I'm so glad you read this one .. its not my normal try .. I respect your particula.. read more
Cherrie Palmer

3 Years Ago

Ham sandwich :)
I loved Emily, in school her poetry and that of Robert Frost were the first t.. read more
Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

thanks Cherrie! :)
It's a very lyrical poem and form and you did well with this one; similar rhyme scheme to what I am using, though I need to work on the rhythm more myself. I am not familiar with forms for the most part so it was nice to learn this one and educate myself with your words. It reads as a very lovely narrative hymn with just the right amount of imagery and tale. 🌹

Posted 3 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

thanks for stopping to read Victoria .. its nice to be getting to know you ... right here at the Caf.. read more
This is a brillant piece of writing. Thisays to me that even in bad times the beauty will always shine.

Posted 3 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

you know, Cowboy! i think that wisdom is so often overlooked during difficult times .. i 100% am wit.. read more
beautiful writings, this one in particular. keep going!

Posted 3 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

thanks Amanda ... i appreciate you .. glad you enjoyed my bit of a tale ;)
E. .. read more


Everything and I do mean absolutely every single little thing is superbly write about this little work of poetic perfection .. A hymn poem for her .. So many lines this would be poet would have been proud to have penned ... ED would be proud of ya too methinks ...................................... N


Posted 3 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

thanks Neville .. you are too kind .. i appreciate all your input on me stuff ... i do hope Emily is.. read more
Neville

3 Years Ago


more than welcome .. more than a pleasure and all mine :)

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1091 Views
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Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on February 15, 2021
Last Updated on February 23, 2021

Author

Einstein Noodle
Einstein Noodle

Pork Rind, AK



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