"The Line" in collaboration with Sleepless Volcano and editing by Richard

an English Sonnet

The Line

Drawn there in rows, they wait on news to come;

the kids play hide-and-seek, while parents paced.

Is no one there to beat their silent drum?   

So thick the dread, all hope is soon erased.

A shout collides on empty space today,

with steel resolve for havens not their own.

A mother gives her babe to thieves in pay,

foul reaping fruits fermenting sin thus sown.

Now, strangers' hands are raised in muted cries,

demanding place to have in have nots' angst.

The child reveals his wide, bewildered eyes,

a light that hopes to shine upon their ranks.

Although the lines are muddied down through time;

alone, a child will pay for all this crime.

Author's Note

Reviews

[barleygirl]

To be honest, my main complaint about sonnets is that they are usually too fluffy in content. It's like poets are concentrating on nailing the form, but the message is often lukewarm romantic tripe that sounds like every other sonnet. Well, let me tell ya, this sonnet does NOT suffer that malady! You have something to say & you say it with such powerful intensity, the reader is completely forgetting to look at whatever traces of "sonnet" might be there to inspect & admire! This is a great poem & I congratulate you all on your poetic efforts & for having such heart (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Einstein Noodle]

oh my goodness dear barley!! how you have made this effort more than worth it .. i agree completely about your complaint with sonnets .. the form often compels the poet to revert to antiquated language .. so very happy you did not find this so .. i read one time that in writing any poetry .. it should always read as one speaks .. i confess i do not always follow that .. but with sonnets .. i think it is especially important .. so glad you decided to review this one my friend!
E.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are right my friend. The children pay for the sins of their father. In the near future. If we don't change our ways. We will leave little for the future. Powerful words and thoughts shared. Coyote

[Einstein Noodle]

thanks so much Coyote man ... so glad you stopped to read and review this one ... God bless ... best of the day to ya! :)
E.

[Coyote Poetry]

Was my pleasure and you are welcome my friend.

[Patricia Wedel]

dear E.... there is a shadow on our land...
a shadow of a Wall where children daily fall.
It breaks my heart as we are born to love and
help one another to survive and not to abuse.
No effort to sort out the criminals...
or disease... only political appease.
For whom the Bell tolls and sadness reigns.
truly, Pat

[Patricia Wedel]

We do have a President who has made an effort to
keep a record and discover the purpose of wanting to
cross our Border. The people in power who have not made an effort to handle Immigrants in a proper manner... will answer to a higher Power. Amen

[Einstein Noodle]

i think so Pat... as we all will answer ... our immigration issue has been a nightmare in my mind ... I agree with you about President Trump ... oh....... i am tempted to get up on me soap box ... suffice it to say that we are a Nation o Laws ... let them be enforced. >;[ we tried to stay non-political with this poem ... kind of presenting both sides of the border ;)

[Patricia Wedel]

dear E... most of us have an open mind as to what is best for our Country. Perhaps there will be a Miracle and we can each vote for what is best for our Country that has a good Constitution with ways to
Make Amendments if necessary. Keep the Faith according to what unfolds. truly, Pat

[Einstein Noodle]

yes!! vote vote vote ;)

[Mrudula Rani]

You have picked a traditional format to express this heart gripping issue, dear E. The format restrictions do not allow freedom to maunder much on this topic, which usually gets passions flowing wildly in all directions ... ideology is hard to contain!
Your couplet sums up eloquently the truth of the subject and evokes so many heartbreaking images from memory and very recent drowned image of father and daughter. An awesome collaboration of the best poets on writerscafe.

[Einstein Noodle]

you are too kind Doc! thank you for such generous encouragement .. so glad this touched you so ... it is a hot button topic in the USA ..loosing sight for real issues in pursuit of an election win .. really gone way down hill the past several years ... we tried to be a bit apolitical with keeping a focus on the children .. without "using" them in our poem like everyone involved uses them in reality .. including parents >;/ really appreciate the time you take on me pages girl .. peace and joy!
E.

[Mrudula Rani]

Your sonnet does justice to this issue beautifully. Your wonderful writings are an inspiration and elucidation. Learning from you is always a pleasure , dear E. All the best.

[Sami Khalil]

A departure from your norm but one that is worthy and exceedingly excellent in substance and collaboration. When people are desperate and flee their countries with their children for a much better country and life, advantageous others who are are organized criminals will take advantage of their vulnerability and suffering to make money. Then when they reach that good country, their expectations are high. Some make it and others keep on trying. Economic hopes are powerful as the promise of jobs and wealth is always in the back of their mind. What a wonderful product you all produced here.

[Einstein Noodle]

couldn't ask for a more encouraging review Sami ... yep .. definitely not my wheel house but i like to try classic forms now and again to help keep me grounded .. in fact I am almost ready to post another sonnet on the Muse ... thanks for taking time Sami ... you are an inspiration for me ... knowing each other is turning into years isn't it .. right here at the Cafe' ;)))
E.

[Sami Khalil]

It is an honor and a privilege to know you. Can't seem to get better friends and talented writers than here. I look forward to more sonnets. You are welcome and all too.

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you .. and back at ya! :)

[gram linski]

We are all the b*****d sons of our fathers sins, a dark, twisting poem to be proud of, thanks E,

[Einstein Noodle]

thanks for taking time gram! most appreciated .. definitely dark lines in this whole situation .. world wide actually .. so much responsibility placed on parents to do our best to keep our sin at bay eh!? love on ya brother! :)
E.

[gram linski]

and as for Hendrix, genius, the only guitarist that didn't like Hendrix was Noel Redding, lol, imagine getting that gig, would you like to play guitar on stage with Jimmi, … the bass, that is …,

[Einstein Noodle]

yes...pure genius for sure ... my Norma doesn't like Hendrix either .. i will never understand that .. as for one stage with him .. of course .. playing drums ;)

[Ken Simm.]

I have reviewed this now four times and each time the bloody gremlins ate it. So Extraordinary, empathic, revolutionary, strong, incredible piece of writing. now to try again.

[Einstein Noodle]

God bless you for your persistence Ken!!! I am blessed always with your visits ... glad this spoke to you as it was meant to ... down yer neck buddy! :)
E.

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

A classical form with a current message that cuts to the bone...Congrats on this excellent, powerful and important collaboration of thoughts and words, music and photo, by all three poets! Together you call out an atrocity that spans centuries, in different forms/different places, and continues this very minute. Children as barter, as innocent pawns, paying the ultimate price for a myriad of sins not their own. Why? How? “A child will pay for all this crime”, while blind eyes turn away. Your deeply moving words give them a voice. Kudos!

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you so much Annette .. for your positive review ... its very encouraging when someone reads and feels the heart of the poem offered ... yes .. across centuries and many countries :((((((
E.

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Gene and Sleepless... It is truly unbelievable that "countries" cannot protect the innocence of
children... even our country because of politics... We are in total shock and the Children suffer...
So heart-wrenching. Your Sonnet done in collaboration, says so much in desperate breaths of
societies suicidal sufferings. I do believe that Poetry could change the evil that has infiltrated many countries... even our own. This would be our prayer to bring the Truth to the forefront. With out Love and Mercy... how can we survive. truly, Pat

[Einstein Noodle]

yes!! wouldn't it be something if all politicians were required to read poetry after morning prayers .. in fact "we the people" need it even more says i! thanks once again for your visit and sensitive reading of this one ... borders are important ... and compassion always ..
E.

[R.E. Ray]

A sonnet worth reading twice and absorbing! A powerful message to the benefit of all who will brave a sonnet. ;)

[Einstein Noodle]

thanks R E! well worth to try says i .. no matter what one's inclination is toward in form .. the discipline of classic forms will produce fruit .. Richard was invaluable in tweaking this one to its "proper" finish ... so gratifying when a poet reads twice!!! thank you sir!
E.

[Great Aunt Astri]

Is this a new poetic line for you? I think this sonnet is very effective,and seems to be perfect in format. Your last two 'resolution' lines conclude the poem beautifully as well as opening it up for future thought. I like it.

[Einstein Noodle]

well ... I have tried sonnets and other classic forms from time to time because I believe I need that foundation to leap from ... too easy to be vague .. stray from theme .. delight only in abstract imaging to evoke feelings .. not quite a new line for me .. but one I am focusing on right now .. they take me such a long time to get anywhere near correct ... but my next will be out in a few weeks I think .. I am calling it "Taps" ;) i sure appreciate you putting your experienced eyeball on this one Auntie .. your opinion is very important says i! ;)
E.

[Great Aunt Astri]

Aw thank you, Einstein