I read "Don’t Worry About Me" by Annette Pisano-Higley https://www.writerscafe.org/writing/ahigley/2093025/ it inspired me to write on the same subject ... not necessarily the same vein ;)
forgive me if i got swept way in your musings..... (Annette could inspire a brick into a broach by the way) this is has a fine meditational tone of death in the depths of your deep lacquered finish but also a nice sense of a rebirth in its catching clutch. much tween the lines in here good sir
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
you read me as the proverbial book sir ...thanks so much for taking time here :) and I agree about A.. read moreyou read me as the proverbial book sir ...thanks so much for taking time here :) and I agree about Annette for sure .. peace and joy on ya Bad One :)
E.
A city and its dwellers relieved of grit and grime while the city sleeps. Dark secrets are relentless as they remain by the gutter. The unwanted lingering of memories. I love this because seems much hidden between the lines.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
yes yes yes Eugi! thank you for such a sensitive sensing in ;) your review has made me morning ... t.. read moreyes yes yes Eugi! thank you for such a sensitive sensing in ;) your review has made me morning ... thank you!
E.
Sadly, I could not find Annette's poem that you mention! (Wanted to read them side-by-side). I haven't lived in a city very much of my life & I've never lived in a city with cadillacs for street sweepers. The ones I've seen are so old & busted up, they hardly pick up anything, just sprinkle the debris with water & then smearing it down the street. Your poem kinda gives me that feeling of the pure uselessness of street sweeping that I've witnessed (always early-dawn dog-walking)! I love it when poets write about the forgotten slices of life (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
well..... i guess i must admit to poetic licensing ;} and yes..the useless sweeping and cleaning .. .. read morewell..... i guess i must admit to poetic licensing ;} and yes..the useless sweeping and cleaning .. we do try over and over don't we .. with the wrong approach .. wrong tools .. wrong time .. what the heck is it in us that just doesn't quite the useless endeavor ;}}}} i am always so glad for your feedback on my abstract poetry .. you help ground me in my attempts ... " I've never lived in a city with cadillacs for street sweepers. The ones I've seen are so old & busted up, they hardly pick up anything, just sprinkle the debris with water & then smearing it down the street." i just love that peach cake! :)
E.
5 Years Ago
I'm getting a teensy urge to write my own version of the smeary street sweeper! *wink! wink!*
5 Years Ago
oh please let me know when
5 Years Ago
ps. try the link for Annette's poem .. its in with the title and explanation stuff
5 Years Ago
the reason I didn't try that is becuz it does not look complete . . . only one letter "o"!?!?! .. read morethe reason I didn't try that is becuz it does not look complete . . . only one letter "o"!?!?!
5 Years Ago
ok I tried it . . . doesn't work!
5 Years Ago
ok! thanks for telling me! try this
https://www.writerscafe.org/writing/ahigley/2093025/read moreok! thanks for telling me! try this
https://www.writerscafe.org/writing/ahigley/2093025/
i think that stinky little grey box with the X in it was at work when i copied and pasted ... it has interrupted a lot of my trying to type ..off to edit the poem and make sure the whole link is in .. :)
5 Years Ago
that little grey box with the X in it messes with my posting anything ... it cuts stuff off .. as in.. read morethat little grey box with the X in it messes with my posting anything ... it cuts stuff off .. as in my above comment .. and won't let me add what i intended to say .. so ...its lying when it says read more .. not because there isn't but because it won'l let you >;/
That "read more" s**t is this website's biggest rabbit hole EVER! *smile*
5 Years Ago
Now that I've read Annette's poem (which blew my socks off), I'm even more in awe of how your mind w.. read moreNow that I've read Annette's poem (which blew my socks off), I'm even more in awe of how your mind works! Wow! It wasn't until just now that I finally saw the street sweeper smears down the pavement as the art of a well-lived life! *wink! wink!*
Sweeping, sweeping, it looks industrious, yet it seems its only moving the dirt around, like the "make busy" work we do to show we are doing SOMETHING with our lives- that's where my mind went when your words took me on this trip. O the places you will go...
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
yes!! really just moving dirt around a bit ;) i always wondered at the value of street sweepers ... .. read moreyes!! really just moving dirt around a bit ;) i always wondered at the value of street sweepers ... those in NY where i grew up used water and steel bristles and did kick dirt out from the curbs ... settled the dust a bit .. but i never knew them to vacuum anything up so it all just went to the middle .. to be rained to the curb .. and swept up again :} have to say again how happy i am to have you around the Cafe' again Barb!
He’s like the grim reaper of the streets. Only, he’s called out because of our careless way of discarding things. It’s a haunting image here. The loneliness of the job even with all those left over signs of life.
I always think of night jobs as lonely because very often people must do them solo or (as they say) with a skeleton crew. And night just has a way of going slower. Creeping over the earth like the street sweeper.
I don’t know, an odd review from me, but the atmosphere you’ve created with this short poem lends its mood. Feels like mist swallowing over the land. Good stuff, here.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
yes..the reaper ;) so happy you caught the mood of this ... and plugged in your own experience .. wh.. read moreyes..the reaper ;) so happy you caught the mood of this ... and plugged in your own experience .. what more could i ask for?! ;)) thanks for stopping by Ellis .. much appreciate your reviewing .. i worked a few night shifts me self .. as a RN in Critical Care ... so the slowing down you speak of was not a part of those .. but my "sweeper" .. has that solo quietude for sure ... peace and joy my friend!
E.
we have to park in our driveways or we get tickets on our cars when the street sweeper comes through. Nicely written write
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
you must live in NY then ;)))))))))) i feel pretty humbled you have stopped to read so many of my po.. read moreyou must live in NY then ;)))))))))) i feel pretty humbled you have stopped to read so many of my poems ... thanks you ever so much .. i appreciate the time taken to review! love on ya
E.
Gene, when I was a kid,
Growing-up in the ghettos, we had no paved streets in our neighborhood (not enough tax value, no doubt), so we had no street sweepers, but I've been downtown when they came whirr-rr-rrring by to stir dust and coat everything in the early morning dew to a thin coat of mud to dry at sunset on cars, windows, and sidewalks, and shame on ya if you're walking home from an all-nighter.
Our streets are paved now, first with brick, then with asphalt and concrete … didn't want you to think we're not up-n-comers ; LOL!
Still, in the hollows of your poem, I sense colored sunsets sweeping lovers in the magic of sensual hues, even a tinge of death, a life is swept into the unknown … this is a work of abstract imagination for me, too, prompted by imagery from your deftly creative pen.
Thank you, My Friend, for sweeping through my grey-matter! ⁓ Richard 🍃
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
wht a pleasure to have your sensitive erading of this Richard ... love that all those things popped .. read morewht a pleasure to have your sensitive erading of this Richard ... love that all those things popped into your nog! i could not feel more gratified in writing ... God bless always my friend!!!
E.
wow, E.
i think you just inspired me with this one...i started remembering the Bronx streets...
and those folks who hung out there having to avoid the sweepers.
but i am reminded of lonely hearts as well...and how when the sun goes down they are swept into that sadness of being alone.
beautiful, expressive write,
and as for your "about me"---we have been and will continue to be blessed by YOUR presence here at WC...
you have much wisdom and even more heart.
j.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
jacob you have made my day this morning already...its 2:52 AM ;) so thank you very much ... i know y.. read morejacob you have made my day this morning already...its 2:52 AM ;) so thank you very much ... i know you to be a discerning reader and that this one moved and inspired you is all anyone could ask for and more ... i keep "false" memories of the Bronx streets from reading and looking at pictures ;) i think most all of NYC has such an incredible rich varied colorful heritage .. have you kept the accent? thanks again sir ... i feel pretty humbled by your review .. and happy!
E.
excellent thought flow, making the mundane alive, good use of words,
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
thanks gram! and great to be getting to know you :) those steel bristles that that would come loose .. read morethanks gram! and great to be getting to know you :) those steel bristles that that would come loose more than once pricked me fingers as i sorted through all the treasures before the sweeps went by ;) thanks you for taking time and a very encouraging review .. peace on ya!
E.
a clever, cleansing write. ouch, sounds a bit painful. made me feel like a piece of white trash. thank Heaven for recycling huh - gives us all more chances before we're retired to the scrap heap ... :)
yes .. a lot like you poem "Burdens" eh!? ... i have vivid memories of the sweepers ... the quiet ho.. read moreyes .. a lot like you poem "Burdens" eh!? ... i have vivid memories of the sweepers ... the quiet hours .. street lamp lighting ... the swish and smell of the wet dust stirred by the "brooms" ... but ... its a cycle isn't it ... best not to neglect the sweeping ... leave the collecting to those who know what to do with our stuff ;) glad you found this one Pete ... thank you so much for taking time to review sir :)
E.
5 Years Ago
where i currently live, they come by each morning between 4-6 am. usually wakes me up, especially i.. read morewhere i currently live, they come by each morning between 4-6 am. usually wakes me up, especially in warm weather when the windows are open ... :)
5 Years Ago
:) i am old and usually up before then ... have had a couple cups of coffee and time to wax poetic ;.. read more:) i am old and usually up before then ... have had a couple cups of coffee and time to wax poetic ;)
So honored to have inspired this E.- thank you so much for the mention! “Dirge City”- so appropos to the content of this vignette. The period at the end of the sentence-nailed shut. Imagery stark, great dramatic pauses and use of alliteration, repetition. Just a hearse. Just a dandelion. Just a sweeper, a weeper- the clean-up of a life. One hand clapping for a life extinguished. Brilliiant my friend.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
i am truly humbled by your review Annette ..thank you so much ...you are gracious and encouraging .... read morei am truly humbled by your review Annette ..thank you so much ...you are gracious and encouraging ... really happy you like it! see ya round the Cafe' eh!? ;)
E.
This morning as I began to log in to WC, it occurred to me what an inspiring and comfortable place this has become for me.
There are so many talented people sharing, encouraging, teaching and learni.. more..