A Poet's Cliche'd Lament

having a bit of fun ;)

Layers of onion

Chisel granite outcropping

Rigormortis sets

Author's Note

Reviews

[barleygirl]

This is a remarkable tiny droplet of an idea that paints a huge portrait in my mind . . . how the icy mountaintops cause granite outcrops to flake off like onion . . . swirling with the idea of how layers of an onion being hardened into rigor-mortis could resemble a poet with writer's block trying to chisel off a few lonely words (is that what you're doing here? *wink! wink!*) Love it! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Einstein Noodle]

yep..it sure is me dahlink Margie!! always tickles me innards to have your visits ... love on ya girl!
E.

[Kathleen Montgomery]

Nice. I like the feel of this.

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you for taking time Kathleen! glad you enjoyed my little bit of fun with senryu :)
E.

[Coyote Poetry]

Nice photo and honest words. Good morning my friend from cold and icy Michigan.
Coyote

[Einstein Noodle]

thanks Coyote! Just a bit of fun with cliches .. the Vortex has most of the country in its grip .. single digits here in AR .. not as bad as you guys have it but very cold for this place. .. a time of "man in lodge" ... (i read that somewhere .. about Lakota Sioux .. it stuck with me) always a fine thing to have your reviews on me stuff sir! stay well and safe ..
E.

[Coyote Poetry]

I am doing well in Michigan. Enough food, no place to go and Johnnie Walker and Crown royal keeping me warm. You are welcome my friend.

[Einstein Noodle]

I'm out of my Kentucky Bourbon ;) but I still have a few days of beer in the fridge.

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Gene.... love your Senryu... even a year later... even more.
I have grown in sensitivity.... and that is important. Now my mind
is fertile with fruity soil and ready for seedlings in the Spring.
Happy Valentines Day with memories. Love and Tapioca pudding.
tenderly, Pat

[Einstein Noodle]

we can all grow in sensitivity my friend .. i so agree with you. thanks for finding this one .. even a year later! makes it all the more sweet to have someone take that extra time to walk streets of old .. "Love and Tapioca pudding" eh .. hmmmmmmmmmm ... sounds like fun .. (naughty me) peace and joy sister and Happy V-Day right back at ya!

[Patricia Wedel]

Gene... ha ha... my Mother made Tapioca pudding by adding each delicate ingredient with a gentle "wisk".
She had so many homemade recipes for pies and cakes. Now that my children are grown and life seems short... I realize the "little" things make a difference. Eating fresh Mulberries... after climbing up and into the Branches as a Child. I dare not climb that high after 65. However, I can still enjoy the flavor of Tapioca Pudding, Be Brave in your Cave.
gently, Pat

[Einstein Noodle]

What great memories you have, Pat! Thanks for sharing them with me. A friend of mine had a mulberry tree in his back yard and it's branches hung downward from the top creating a kind of "nest" up there. Once we clawed our way through those branches we were sitting on top of the world eating those mulberries to our full.

[Kesch (Finding Julia)]

wow! very descriptive imagery here, nicely done

[Einstein Noodle]

thanks kescha! glad you enjoyed!! :)

[Shazbatt969]

Peeling off skin
revealing marble bone
A hardness ...

[Einstein Noodle]

that's about it Shazbatt! ;) thanks so much for taking time on me pages! :)
E.

[Maxwell Ryder]

Imagery and metaphor in search of a poem, that’s somehow a poem, a haiku, or representative of writer’s block, all in one.

[Einstein Noodle]

:) yep! spot on Max! thanks so much for taking time to read and review
E.

[AYVID N]

Such vivid impressions brought to mind here...The concentric-ness of the mind, the incessant thoughts running in circles, countless ideas forming, going nowhere and dying without a breath, leads to rigormortis, of the pen and of inspiration. For people who live to create and to write, this limbo is of death. I hope I could do justice to your thoughts and words, E...

[Einstein Noodle]

oh my goodness dahlink! you have gone deep indeed! :) i am so humbled by your impressions ... you took my few cut flowers and made a full bouquet of them ... thanks so much for sharing your thoughts on this one ... and all those you have read on me pages, Divya ... much appreciate the support and encouragement my friend!

[AYVID N]

It’s always a pleasure E. A poem that makes the reader think, helping them derive relatable conclusions from the images drawn on paper is exemplary poetry and something I always learn from and aspire towards 🌸

[Einstein Noodle]

i think we're on the same branch dahlink! ;)

[Patricia Wedel]

Layers of onion steamed with desire... pealed
ever so slightly can be tender and sweet...
accompanied with a light wine and candlelight...
holding each other tight. truly, Pat

[Einstein Noodle]

again you surprise me in such a fine way with your review .. i love onions ... raw .. they are so very sweet and add such flavorful contrast to the hot peppers i also cook with ... now...i just need that bit of wine ;))))))))))
E.

[Patricia Wedel]

Onions and garlic with sweet green pepper sautéed with summer squash of different persuasions ... in light olive oil and fresh tomatoes... with a few dashes of nutmeg... poured over steamed rice or egg noodles... served with your favorite wine... Bon appetite dear friend. as ever, Pat

[Einstein Noodle]

mmmmmmmmmmmm i have never used nutmeg ... something to try says i!

[Richard🖌]

Well,
With this crafty little Senryu, you've enticed me to have a bit of fun, too, trying to discern abstractness into simplicity
Hm? Let me see, and don't you dare giggle at my fumbling attempts … I never was a whiz at interpretation.

Layers of onion (like stacks of thought, feeling, emotion?)
Chisel granite outcropping (hardened creativity radiating-out?)
Rigormortis sets (Rigor mortis [two words] / writer's block?)

Synopsis (no laughing!): When writer's block sets-in, one's inner expressions quit flowing, and the only way to get to them is through arduous struggle and setting the spirit free, by chiseling-away at outside interferences.

There you have it!
The abstract verbosity of a literal mind … LOL!

I really dig that cool olde-time black 'n white mining scene.
Thanks, My Always Enjoyable Friend, for the light, fun entertainment! ⁓ Richard : )

[Einstein Noodle]

yes..well... sometimes cliche's can take on flare can't they ... i confess that calling out to those wise and meditative East and using the form is probably cheating a bit ;) your Synopsis is spot on ... and you do make me chuckle (sorry) i had fun writing this and glad you had fun reviewing with your mwahvelous eye sir! :))))))))))))))
E.

[Richard🖌]

Spot-on(?) … really!?
Now, I've got both thumbs hooked in my suspenders, stretching 'em out, with a huge GRIN! : D

[Einstein Noodle]

ahahahaha...me too now! ;)

[Carola]

almost a haiku poem !
sorry i didn't quite understand it at first, a bit too esoteric for my brain until i read barleygirl's review, then i got it!!
being short & succinct with words is not always easy, i think.

[Einstein Noodle]

its a senryu ;) or attempts to be .. i love both forms being a minimalist at heart ... i am so pleased that you wrestled with it a bit .. i can be pretty abstract ... a lot of the time ;} but i am working on it ... Barley Girl is a very linear person ... thinking of her keeps me on track (sort of) when i get too far out there and no one knows what it is i write about .. including me ..my mother in law (rest her soul) told me when i first started to write poetry that being abstract too much ruins the poem for everyone who reads it .. she wrote a lot of poetry ... so i keep her advice with me as well .. but sometimes something will just feel right and tho abstract has a value in just the words and images ... thanks so much again for taking time Carola ... nice to be getting to know you ... right here at the Cafe" :)
E.