Standing Stone

the privacy of her expectations

kept 

those things hidden tight  

                  I

pushed them into compression locks, she

squeezing shut and squinted yet

still oozing her secrets; it

couldn't be helped

in hieroglyphic mazes we bleed our ignorance

Tell me darling!            Please!                    I beg

standing  stupor with a pick- shovel 

and sifter ....shaking ... ever shaking 

through the debris  to glimpse

some bit of

understanding

            

never settling

honestly ........... tombs of the ancients are an easier task

01/24/2018

E.

Author's Note

Reviews

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

This is a deeply moving and personal journey written in a unique dramatic format- i can easily hear this as a spoken poem...a lover with the object of his love figuratively entombed by her secrets, expectations and emotional debris- and he trying to dig her out literally and figuratively. Brilliant metaphor. Eloquent and poignant words reveal unbearable
undercurrents of pain and frustration. I concur, a most formidable and long- suffering task to endeavor. I hope that luck, strength and infinite understanding prevail for this poor protagonist. Great write my friend!

[Einstein Noodle]

God bless you for your very understanding read of this..and thank you so much for pointing out what you liked about it ... i truly appreciate your review and understanding heart Annette ... i feel so gratified and validated ...thank you again my friend ;))
E.

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

Your poem touched my heart E. Blessings and light wished back to you.:)

[Ken Simm.]

Fascinating and multi layered. The reader can approach this in so many ways but I prefer to see it through the shadows of my own experience.
A remarkable piece of thoroughly intelligent writing.

[Einstein Noodle]

Conas atá tú? ;) what a happy man i am at your visit my friend ...i need to stop by your place and see if you have something new .. glad you liked the read and i could not be more thankful for your response ... universal and personal ... i could not be more pleased! thank you sir.... feicfidh mé ar ball thú
E.

[ashkat]

"squeezing shut and squinted yet
still oozing her secrets" - oh i wish i'd written this description. it's - well you can taste it, see it, feel it. It's visceral.

love the imagery of ancient egypt in there; a metaphor for secrets and censors and lost truths.
beautiful.
agree too that i'd love to hear it spoken out loud.

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you my new friend! i know that you "feel" this one ...we have some similar inner cores i think ;)
E.

[Sami Khalil]

One of your best. I like it so much.
Lower your expectations, lower your surprises.
Keep secrets hidden, keep the peace.
Undertsand the other's wants and needs, stay in the just balance.
Point out past or current mistakes, get the bees nest.
Write a wonderful poem, get great review.

[Einstein Noodle]

wow Sami!! so humbled...truly ...by your remarks ..i appreciate all your visits ..isn't it crazy how we can offer something that we don't think too much of ..or that we think is pretty good ..and the responses are just the opposite ;) i am encouraged a lot by your review as this was just a voice inside without any makeup ;)
E.

[Sami Khalil]

So True. You are welcome...

[Norman 223]

Personal interaction is often metaphysical . Poetry is often metaphorical. Searching for understanding depends on scaling the barriers. I hope I have navigated the complex maze of words here, E. in my interpretation of your poem..... N.:)

[Einstein Noodle]

yep ... certainly can be all that indeed ... perhaps why we have so much fun at it ;) oh those barriers right?! ;)))
E.

[lightsong]

This is intense, yet bleeds with wanting to be soften, and it's soft at times, like a summer's sea waves, holding a kind of warmth, the poem is like a wave, changing from feeling to another due to the more than one state it carries, the urging from You, the caring loving urging from You that takes a ride on anger when it seems it has no response to, I think of those who are drawn in their situations thinking no one cares, and they believe so, might even turns into stones, but we know inside they are gentle, they just hide safe (that's what they think off) inside that tough shell, it might be hard to break it and make them get out, but we shouldn't stop because we care about them, and it might takes only a moment when we will see them laying their hand to us.

this poem holds speciality and shows Your true loving nature, Your strength, in a unquie way.
Happy Weekend for You Mr. Loving E!

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you so much for you very kind words Light...and for taking time to really get into this poem ..you bring out things that are the inspiration and feelings of the protagonist ...rather than concentrate too much on the object ...thank you again for you insightful read ..much appreciate :))))
E.

[Great Aunt Astri]

He doesn't understand her, and I don't think she wants him to! Perhaps she keeps her secrets locked up, because she doesn't understand either! I love the imagery ..compression locks, hieroglyphic mazes, pick shovel. I sense the frustration and the irregular format seems to echo it. Clever poem.

[Einstein Noodle]

yes perhaps ;) thanks for visiting ma'am...your reviews are always important ... so happy the frustration comes across loud and clear ...i can be pretty oblique at times ;}
E.

[Great Aunt Astri]

Well, you know better what this poem is about. I would love an explanation. Probably very metaphorical and indicating something on a far greater scale?

[Einstein Noodle]

oh...i think you hit it spot on ;) just about a man and woman and frustrating conflict of want and need ...happens all the time i believe ;)

[Einstein Noodle]

ps. strictly from the man's point of view .. so i much appreciate you making the "other" sides case made as well ;))))

[Great Aunt Astri]

I might write a poem in response! :}........

[Einstein Noodle]

oh i think you should Auntie ..please let me know if and when you do :)))))))))))))))))))

[Lorry]

Damn those heiroglyphic mazes and the crumbs of answers that only lead to more questions.
I feel this is written with soft, pondering touch, rather than frustration, and if I am reading it correctly, a bit like your thousandth visit to see Mona Lisa...Still awestruck, but nowhere nearer understanding that enigmatic smile.
Perhaps more answers will come E, perhaps not...but there's always the hope of one day understanding.
Superb piece. Very contemplative and thought provoking.

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you so much for your sensitive and thorough review ..yes..just try to understand the Mona's smile ;} but i must confess there is some frustrations in this one :)
E.

[Cherrie]

Controlling the mood of a poem is well mastered here. It is a blending of the reader's perception and images created. A very excellent job

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you for taking time Cherrie! very much appreciate your reviews always ... thank you again!
read morethank you for taking time Cherrie! very much appreciate your reviews always ... thank you again!
E.

[SleeplessVolcano]

oh wow....those oozing secrets......we often find ourselves in the graveyards of our forgotten memories, trying to figure out, "How did I get here, again?".......You penned this one with the skill of a surgeon my friend......so, which type of surgeon are you? :P

[Einstein Noodle]

hmmmmmmmmmmmm the one with the butcher knife???? ;) thanks for your encouraging words Sleepless ..yes! secrets never to be revealed ... and no cracking the seals ...;}
E.

[R.E. Ray]

First, despite my initial impression about the seemingly chaotic structure, it made sense after reading this poem. What first appears a jumbled mess of words actually reflects the message you convey here (or as I interpreted it).

I certainly get the pain and frustration, trying to "unlock" another person's brain, to understand them better, to get closer. It's what makes the closest relationships. Still, when we fail, or they don't allow us inside the inner vault, even after death (physically or emotionally), we still dig for the truth, a deeper understanding. And, sometimes we learn more from history than from the present. A mind-bending but thought-provoking piece. I enjoyed this work very much.

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you for your honesty sir..glad you got past the lack of proper form...this is typically how i write but do try to challenge myself with more classic forms from time to time ..if you find time to search you will find them here and there ... your perception of my intent is spot on ... thank you for again visiting and reviewing my stuff! :)
E.