My Eye Beholds a Winsome Song

My Eye Beholds a Winsome Song

A Poem by Einstein Noodle
"

Editing help from Richard

"
My eye beholds a winsome song for naught
but I to hear; and tho, nay ears can speak
my words will sail, unfurl, such want and reach
a  rocky, jagged bleed too far aloft.
My only ring  undone was held and fought
a heart sublime to render fallow each.
Her love and fields left empty; long impeached
in future hemlock groves tween strangled thought.
Nay words to thee from pinkest lips upon
frail grassy knoll dare mean to drink my fill.
Your nectar there, as dew, so sweet to tongue
repleat with mercies yielding bliss now gone.
Depart and send up song for ears to thrill
this heart and stop the bleed for love's undone.

© 2017 Einstein Noodle


Author's Note

Einstein Noodle


The Petrarchan sonnet is divided into two stanzas, the octave (the first eight lines) followed by the answering sestet (the final six lines). The rhyme scheme, abba, abba, cdecde or cdcdcd


My Review

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Featured Review

I just love the way poetry says everything so eloquently. These words are so beautiful-winsome,song, naught, sail, unfurl, aloft, sublime, groves, grassy, knoll, nectar, dew, bliss, sweet and thrill-that I had to remind myself that I was witnessing heartbreak. Excellent, E.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Einstein Noodle

7 Years Ago

;) ....perfect! ...thank you my friend! thank you very very much :))
E.



Reviews

This was so beautiful to read. I've never tried a sonnet and always in awe of those who can. The pain was felt and the composition was perfect. Well done E!

Posted 2 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

2 Years Ago

thank you for taking time and such an encouraging, kind review. I am so glad you enjoyed it. they ar.. read more
AYVID N

2 Years Ago

You are most welcome dear E. Stay safe you too. Hugs. 🙋‍♀️💕
THIS IS A BEAUTIFULLY. PENNED SONNET E. AS I READ EACH LINE , EVERY WORD TOUCHED ME DEEPLY AND BROUGHT BACK MANY MEMORIES OF LONG AGO. I APPLAUD YOU ON LEARNING AND BEING ABLE TO WRITE SUCH A BEAUTIFUL SONNET. HSG 😇

Posted 2 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

2 Years Ago

what a treat and welcome sight of your pic and name Ms. Heavenscent! it has been a while .. there ar.. read more
heavenscentgirl1

2 Years Ago

IT WAS MY PLEASURE TO READ YOUR SONNET MY FRIEND. I AGREE THAT RICHARD IS A WONDERFUL TEACHER B.. read more
Einstein Noodle

2 Years Ago

i hear you .. forms and fitting into them is like a too small corset! :)))))))
How sweet loss can seem when pen meets paper! Alas! I believe it was Tennyson who said "Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all" this brings me back to that marvelous work. Bravo

Posted 2 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

2 Years Ago

nice to meet you Gideon .. yes! i agree that loving and loosing is better than to have never .. our .. read more
Most of your poems make me feel like I'm a little late to the party. You have a lot of views and reviews. Ha. You definitely appear to me to be a master of breaks and beat, so when I saw this I had to stop, read, absorb, and give you a hearty back slap in words. Pretty damn good R&M. I liked this one a lot. Sometimes they can be a headache to write, but you've shown your range, made it your big B. Good stuff.

Posted 5 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

5 Years Ago

thank you for such encouragement ... tho you may be sorry ;} i have a need to ground me self from ti.. read more
CD Campbell

5 Years Ago

You are very welcome.
Lilting, lovely classical poem. Form and rhyme pristine. Exquisitely passionate "Send up song for ears to thrill the heart and stop the bleed for love's undone."-Methinks the Bard is smilling down on you sir E.!:)

Posted 7 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

7 Years Ago

so glad you visited this one Annette...it is so out of my norm and is difficult for me ..so i have a.. read more
I'm sorry I can't go into raptures over this poem. I'm just not "into" this hoity-toity Elizabethan type language. To me, it makes a poem sounds like every other Elizabethan type poem to my undiscerning ear. I know there must be some bangin' crafting going on here, but I find myself cottoning more to a conversational style, I guess (((HUGS)))

Posted 7 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

7 Years Ago

i know you do Ms. barley! so bravo for getting through it ;) not my norm either but I attempt classi.. read more
barleygirl

7 Years Ago

One of my weaknesses is not trying new things more often than I do. Occasionally I'll try on a persp.. read more
Einstein Noodle

7 Years Ago

love your hugs! its funny that when fitting everything to this Italian Sonnet form it kind of impres.. read more
there is almost hope at the end...that someone could start a new song for you to see. I love all the paradoxes in this---
"my only ring undone"
i've had a few of those "undone"
it is like unmaking the rings in Lord of the Rings...have to climb Mt. Doom.

love your perspectives and usage of imagery, E.
j.

Posted 7 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

7 Years Ago

ps. have you seen this?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kT-1MjThHEk
jacob erin-cilberto

7 Years Ago

yes, the "Silmarillion" getting through the first 200 pages a bit troublesome, but then the making.. read more
Einstein Noodle

7 Years Ago

yep ...so engrossing .. amazing world he created ..way back in the 40 ish years ... i have 4 childre.. read more
dear Gene... My father was an avid reader of Shakespeare. I appreciate your poetry with a twist of lime... as though drinking your words is intoxicating. truly, Pat

Posted 7 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

7 Years Ago

thank you Patty ..you are very kind .. its wonderful this brought thoughts of your Da to mind ..so g.. read more
"dare mean to drink my fill.
Your nectar there, as dew, so sweet to tongue
repleat with mercies yielding bliss now gone.
Depart and send up song for ears to thrill"

Posted 7 Years Ago


"My only ring undone was held and fought
a heart sublime to render fallow each.
Her love and fields left empty; long impeached"

Posted 7 Years Ago


Einstein Noodle

7 Years Ago

double thanks Sami ... i am very gratified and truly humbled you quote the lines .. i am kinda proud.. read more
Sami Khalil

7 Years Ago

Wow. You are welcome...;).....................

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Added on March 24, 2017
Last Updated on March 24, 2017

Author

Einstein Noodle
Einstein Noodle

Pork Rind, AK



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This morning as I began to log in to WC, it occurred to me what an inspiring and comfortable place this has become for me. There are so many talented people sharing, encouraging, teaching and learni.. more..

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