The Man I wish I Wan't

A quick quip from the point of view of an old solder.

I wake from my dream, the exact dream I've had for years. I don't even think it could be considered a dream, more like a nightmare. You'd think I'd be used to it by now, but the fear I exhibit says otherwise. This dream of dark thoughts and memories, things that should be locked away forever and refused to be let out again. The blood that stains my past and keeps me from being able to have a future. The things I've done, the faces I've seen, that have seen me, hated me, begged me for mercy, but I refused them. Men, women, and children alike, on their hands and knees, begging I stay me hand, only to be silenced by the hands of the men I commanded. To think an old man like myself, a man so feeble and ill, could take  and retake the lives of millions. A solder, answering to some other power. A power that knows no love, nor compassion, nor mercy. A power that knows only hate and murder.