The cured nightmare

written for someone who is mine forever.....

 

 

 

It always starts the same way…..I’m alone. I’m in this secluded place and it’s always so very dark there. I feel the rough dry sand beneath my bear feet and the cold relentless winds chill my entire body numb. I’m huddled into myself with no more on me than a black pair of denim shorts. They are torn and tattered look more like rags than clothing. I know they symbolize the hatred and fears I possess deep within me and the tears are my long gone and broken trusts towards any human.

Its dark here, and very cold, and every way I look there’s miles of sands and pure nothingness. I’m always exhausted and starving, unable to cry for help for I am too weak. No one would come to my aid anyways. I am just a forgotten soul in this desert land.

No other life but I roams here. All I can do is stay huddled on the ground and water the sands with my endless tears, for I am so alone and rejected and cannot bear those burdens.

This reoccurring dream…no, this nightmare is not ok at all. For even when I am awake I know I am alone and no one will aid me, and still feel the pains. I feel exposed and just want to hide from the ones who make it worse with each moment they are near me.

I am in the wasteland every night I sleep. It is so bleak and droll and so very hopeless. Why can’t I wake from this? Why do I always end up here? Why must my min remind me of what I already know all too well of this pathetic life…..and the wounds I suffer.

I am cut all over most the time I am there. Bleeding painfully to this thirsty and unforgiving sand. Each grain of sand represents another moment of time I must pointlessly suffer.

Then one night while I’m of course balled up in agony in my desert. A glance outward, what do I see? It’s a shadowy figure. How? Is it really there? It draws near. I just watch and gather what I can about it.

She is female and about my age. Beautiful with a hazel eyes with a blue ring on the outside edge, and the brown in her eyes matches her medium length hair. She is taller with curves that show a thin lean body. A flat round face she has with a smile stuck to it as well as a pair or glasses that hug tight to her pulled back ears and a smile is stuck on her face. She had long thin legs and long arms too with a slightly rounded nose. She was beautiful.

She comes in no more than worn blue jeans and a plain black t-shirt. She too was bear foot and feels the sand as she takes more steps to me. I was in panic. What is this? Another way this land will hurt me? Is she even real? Of just an illusion…..

Again, she is stepping closer. Meer feet away and she stops there, staring into my frightened eyes. Her smile widens, though her eyes suggest its kind and she is wanting something. Who are you? I only ask it silently. But somehow she knows. “don’t be afraid. I have heard your cries. I’ve traveled far in this barren hell, searching for you.” she says in a quieting tone, then she steps foreword and I scramble back on the ground.

She continues to me. The commotion of my movements has caused my hundreds of cuts and slashes to bleed again in successions. They burn and ache as tears flow again. She kneels in front of me and stares as she lends out her hand. I do not take it. What fool would I be to trust a stranger such as this girl? I am convinced this is all a cruel trick.

She see’s that her hand means nothing. She slowly leaned forward till last second and she falls on the sand with her knees. Her arms go up and come down around me as she quickly and gently pulls me to her. My head goes right below her chin and she rests it on my head. Then one hand holds me to her on my back and her other hand on my head.

I do not struggle or resist, I fear to. What was she doing to me? Then as she held me to her chest and rocked I felt something. My wounds, all of them were closing and healing slowly. All of them fix themselves till my skin is cold with fresh unbroken flesh. Now I am cold.

She pulls me in tighter, now stroking my hair. How delicate she acts, careful of my fragileness. I feel warmth, but not from her body heat, but of her heart, and it stops the shivering in my bones. She is humming now. Nice, soothing, and calming.

Now I am engulfed in her hold. Slowly I lift my arms up and put them around her now too. Now we sit in the sand holding each other. She’s whispering to me, I cannot hear what she is saying, but her tone is reassuring. I lift my head and lock into her eyes.. Pictures and memories flash in my head. Though they are happy ones, I do not recognize them.

“are…are you…an angel?” I manage to ask. “no my dear, better. I am your soul mate. I am here to save you from this desert.” then she leans down and kisses me in an indescribable sense. And we hold our lips as one with closed eyes. A furious passion that I know is real and true.

All the sand of the time to suffer slowly falls away. It is all gone and then I fall too, only to watch her stay where she is and she looks down at me falling.

I fall onto something with a small thud. It is my bed. I am awake now, my eyes furiously searching my surrounding to ensure I’m conscious. I am. Looming over my bedside with a hand on my hip was her. I suddenly started to rapidly tell her the dream in a panicked fashion, just as fast as I could.

She put a finger over my lips with a small shush and I stopped while watching the girl. She was the one in my dream….. “it’s ok,” she says delicately, “I know this all. I was there.” she leaned down and kissed me as before.

She saved me, helped me be happy once more when no one else would or could. She was there with me and for me and gave me what I needed. I am in debt to her for all of it. The feelings I had for her are near unable to be said. I would give it all for her now, life and death. Just her call I would arrive. I love her more than anything, more than humans can understand.

I’d forgive her for anything she ‘s do to me and have done. Without her everything is pointless. My desert would reform, and I would soon die. She saved me from everything. The beauty with a mind to show and a real heart. Anything she wishes is hers. I am forever yours. And if you ever read this encounter of what happened, know this my dear:

You are an angel as well as my soul mate, and I love you. Something in which will never change…I promise…..