The ramblings of a crazy, sleepless mind

I'm tired and I can't sleep. This is the result. this is pretty much brain throw up so yeah.

I've always wondered am I a hypochondriac.  Sometimes I'll be sick and think well I'm still sick then assess myself and think well I don't feel sick so am I pretending to get attention.  I don't think I am.  Then I think well if I'm worrying about it does that really make me one?  It's just like if I think I'm crazy does that mean I'm not.  I know I act crazy a lot, and I talk to myself.  But everyone does that sometimes right?  And really if I was crazy wouldn't someone else have noticed and commited me or something.  So I must not be.  And no one's compained to me about being a hypochondriac either.  Of course I could still be one of those even if someone doesn't say something crazy is very different then a hypocondriac.  Of course a psychologist has a say in both I think or at least if your crazy or a hypocondriac you should probably see one they'll give you drugs to help or let you talk your problems out.  Maybe I shouldn't be using the pronoun 'you' it just seems weird since I'm really jsut talking figuratively and not even really about myself anymore, which seemed to be how I started maybe I should go back to that.  Okay like if your mean or nice I think I'm being mean then feel bad about it because I'm most likely lucky to have those people I'm being mean to.  So doesn't that make me a mean person even though I'm worried about being mean or does that make me a nice person who worries about being mean.  and really sometimes I can't even tell the difference.   also alot of the time I'm joking because if people aren't laughing over something I've said because I'm witty really what use am I'm.  I'm not good at anything else.  I'm only witty sometimes when i'm lucky so i have to tease and make people laugh.  but sometimes it's mean teaseing and i realize it to late.  then it's just awkward and i'm grasping for something else funny to say to cover up my stupidness.  really sometimes i'm amaze people even want to be around me i'm annoyed at myself most of the time.  and i know when i say annoying things like when i always have to correct people and show that i'm smart in something cause really i'm not i just remember stupid little trivial things.  i know it annoys people to be corrected and i can tell they are annoyed by the silence afterward.

Author's Note

please comment good or bad I want them!