The Darkness

He stands alone in the darkness
Nothing to keep the pain from his heart
He's been this way from the start
He try's to erase the past
The memories are a constant cast
He tries to hide behind a mask
But everyone can see his task
He wants to take his life
He slowly raises the knife...

Author's Note

I tried.

Reviews

[Jennie Baron]

Just one detail to get out of the way; there's a place where you have "try's" instead of "tries." As for the content, it is beautiful and it's also troubling subject matter to my basically optimistic nature. But the great thing about poetry is that it challenges us to think in new ways.

[IceWinifredd]

Not a bad poem. I wouldn't say this one is your best, but it definitely wasn't bad. I think that what bothered me the most of this poem was the rhyming. It feels forced, like the words didn't flow naturally when you wrote it. It doesn't have the same feel at the others you've written that were much better. Still, it doesn't change my mind about your poetry. You're still a very good poet. Nice work.

[Wynter Ignatius]

Wonderful as I have often felt just like that at times in my life. Kudos and keep it up.

wow... cold chills ran down my spine and back up as... I truly wanted to reach out and take the kniofe away and hug this person... Most excellent

[lissalovesyou]

Oh dear, the last line...His agony is finally coming to an end.
lissalovesyoui:)

[Honey-Bee]

A vivid picture of despair and the desire to end ones life with a knife...He tries to erase the past, the memories are a constant cast...Agonizing pain with no escape. How sad! Nice poem! Thanks for sharing!

[Trenton Colburn]

I love how you put this into words. No longer thoughts and emotions racing thru your mind, and the minds of so many others. you are an amazing writer along with a ton of other things. awesome job on this!

[Kasey Miriam]

Wonderful write. It reminds me of myself last year with all that i was going through. Thank you Jack for sending request to read this and Stew please take a moment to look into my writting a few of them you may enjoy.

[A Soap Mess Stories]

Such a tragedy when one contemplates to take their own life...great write.

[A. Amos]

this was interesting and great read...