In there somewhere is goodbye

Some life experiences bring a finality and an inner chaos that would not relent. Hence the jumbled imagery and tones. Hope the points carry across, subtle or otherwise.

In there somewhere was goodbye

.



Shoulders slump as footsteps fade into
the darkened hallway; out of sight.
Then a click-sound of a door, shut;
punctuates a chest-heaving full-stop.

Regret now seeps across the
tidal plain, waiting in vain hope
for a reverse ebb that doesn't arrive.
Regret, only regret remains:

Strain and hear that inaudible sigh
as you lock lips in silhouetted embrace;
It was the kiss of a toxic cocktail--

It's the burnt smell of rubber
that lingers thick in the air after
the smoldered wreck on the road.

It's the ping of a pin dropping
after a grenade had been lobbed
and the afterthought of my diving --

But did I dive to shield you or
was it to duck out of the way?

Regret is the sound of pebbles
tapping off a casket lid as they
bounce from a cascade of apologies.

Still that door clicks shut -- the last time.
Your footfalls fade into the bright,
searing light of the pain that is left behind.






.

Reviews

[andrew mitchell]

This for me resonates the day in the life of living in chaos. The typical bad luck scenario, bad life choices and living with the outcomes. Just shows we are not guaranteed a smooth life, just a life that we can learn from our mistakes however painful they maybe. A Nice poetic format Frederick.

[Red Brick Keshner]

Thanks Andrew, that is the nuts and bolts of the poem, exactly. A very astute review. Your interaction is always welcome.

[W. Barrett Munn]

I think you have expressed well the jumbled emotional states that accompany deaths. There is no straight line between the denial and final acceptance.

Winston

[Red Brick Keshner]

Thanks Winston,the truth that lay in your welcome response is a blessed consolation.

[keith]

way back write that passes the test of time
life can be a heavy load at times
the weave of write is impressive
the choice of events is rememberable

you got it/had it
opening the vault of writes serves purpose
thanks!

[Red Brick Keshner]

There are treasures of old and new vintage. Thanks kindly Keith.

[Gee]

I'm not a big one for hindsight and regrets especially if events that unfolded were not of my causing.
Enjoyed the read, loved the last 6 lines Freds

[Red Brick Keshner]

Regret, like misery has gone the way of guilt trip and gaslighting... once freed from that, life is so much for the living. Thanks for visiting and your much appreciated words, it has been a while.
Freds

[Gee]

Aye, a while indeed. Have struggled with a mushed brain post Covid, only now really returning to some sort of normality

[Red Brick Keshner]

I totally get that. We have good days here and some otherwise not all that good. But we're scraping back into a sense of us again, peace to you!

[Coyote Poetry]

I understand this poem dear Frederick.
"Regret is the sound of pebbles
tapping off a casket lid as they
bounce from a cascade of apologies."
The above lines. I have felt. It leave us feeling empty. When we needed even ground and we didn't get the even ground, we needed. Break our hearts. Thank you for sharing the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[Red Brick Keshner]

I found that regret wasn't among the easiest things to put into words but the challenge of that allows us to bring it to life through metaphor and story. And that we draw from experience and what we have witnessed that has touched us. Thanks kindly dear Coyote.
Frederick.

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree dear Frederick and you are welcome.

[Soren]

Your analogies struck deep being visceral and haunting. Regret is living in the past, a place that no one can alter. It is easier to change one's mindset than to carry the past. A poignant poem. Well done

[Red Brick Keshner]

Thanks Soren, that much appreciated response both grounds and centers. Cheers.

[willweb]

I don't know which part grabs me the most, some of the abstract analogies that feel like someone's nosey neighbor or the hard hitting, reach in your chest and rip your heart out pain that this expresses. I can say with all certainty, that last stanza was killer...really cool.

[Red Brick Keshner]

Thanks Will, at least there are a couple of grab you's to choose from. Perhaps they kind of balance each other out. Perhaps it makes for a "stereophonic/scopic" experience.

[willweb]

I think all of the above. : )

[Red Brick Keshner]

Cheers Will!

[Sami Khalil]

Goodbyes 👋 are hard on the overall mental state especially if there are no closures. Well expressed sir.

[Red Brick Keshner]

Allow me to express my gratitude Sami. Your encouraging words in response to this poem are much appreciated.

[Sami Khalil]

My pleasure 😊. You are welcome anytime.

[Ken e Bujold]

the next to last verse in this emotional write is thought stopping Fred. The entire poem returned me to various times and places in my life where these emotions were the raw wounds I thought would stay open forever. Like everyone I have had my share of family friends and even a few villains pass. And while we tell ourselves to triumph the good times in life we shared, the reality is often, at least for me much more in line with the apologies and regrets you so eloquently express in the mentioned verse.
like Lightsong I wonder how no one thought to leave a review in all this time? and like you, it is one of the mysteries of social medium we reside in. a world in and out side of a world

ken

[Red Brick Keshner]

The casket percussion!? That still gives me the shivers. Thanks kindly for affirming that portion. It's something that could be keloided over but fresh each occasion its integument is ravaged by that can opener of regret.

[lightsong]

200 views since 2014 with not even one single review?!?

The weight of your deep silent pain is felt through your expressions, a profound piece that speaks in that very personal way, when the reader can't help but feel it as if it's their moments. great work my friend.

[Red Brick Keshner]

Beats me friend. No poem or person as hideous as not to bear the slightest acknowledgment but those are the breaks in social media. It probably could be worse. Thanks most kindly for your visit and much appreciated words.

[lightsong]

let us say that out of the 200, 40 have read it completely, 15 who didn't want or couldn't leave a review for any kind of reason. where are the other 15, 10 ok at least 5 ones? I understand all the craziness about media, but some things can't be fully grasped, unless there is something we are missing?

You are kindly welcome~

[Red Brick Keshner]

...there are quite a few unlovable internet personages? That seems to be a recurring possibility, lol

[lightsong]

lol could it be , could it be... now I think I am lucky enough to be one of the loving and lovable internet personages lol

[Red Brick Keshner]

That is most fortunate and non surprising a state as can be desired.

[lightsong]

Remember my friend, You can't please everyone, just love yourself as it is :>

[Red Brick Keshner]

And that truth is what has kept me around all this time; thanks most kindly. Signed with a white ginger lily.

[lightsong]

" Signed with a white ginger lily" now that made my day :> Thanking You so much*

[Red Brick Keshner]

That's my flower. There are several that mean much to me but this is the primary one. You are most welcome.

[lightsong]

now the thanking is extra extra more :>