I Wish

Sometimes you wish you could just be 'normal'.

Sometimes I wish I could stop pretending, 
That I could take off this mask, 
That for once I could tell the truth, 
When someone stops to ask, 
That when I'm in a room of people, 
That voice inside my head, 
Isn't being nasty, 
But saying positive things instead. 

Sometimes I wish I wasn't an expert, 
In hiding how I feel, 
In acting so happy go lucky, 
To frightened to reveal, 
That beneath the surface I'm but a shell, 
So empty and so hollow, 
Full of swirling emotions, 
So much despair and sorrow, 

Sometimes I wish I wasn't so scared, 
Of how people might react, 
If they found out how damaged I am, 
My heart broken, cracked, 
If they knew the kind of thoughts, 
That go through my head, 
Wishing I could leave this world, 
Wishing I was dead, 

But sometimes most of all, 
I wish that I was whole, 
That I wasn't this broken mess, 
With emotions I can't control, 
That when I smile or laugh, 
I can feel it inside too, 
And I wish that all my pretending, 
One day could possibly be true.