Chapter 1

There once was a red brick cottage and it sat austerely atop a grand hill. Inside this house was a young girl. A girl named Allison, Allison Fields. Alli as she was known by, was a scrawny 13 year old with thick bushy curls and an unforgettable smile. She had no parents that she knew and lived with her eccentric Aunt Meredith. Meredith collected teapots and lint. She even had a dress with lint teapots on it. All her life Alli had been the different child. The one who comes to school with jam smeared all over her skirt, the kid with pickled beets for lunch and the girl with with no parents. Every day when Meredith came to walk Alli home the parents stared with disgust. 

"How could a woman like that raise a child? They wondered.

The sneers and dirty glances never seemed to bother Meredith though. A queer person, she hardly ventured far from home most of her life. Of course when I came to live with her she got out more. 

Author's Note

I wrote this late at night and this is all I could get down. You guys, seriously, do NOT let me stop this or give up. I have great ideas for this.

Reviews

[Emunah June.]

Wow. I wont let you! DONT STOP! DONT! DONT! DONT!

[kaitt]

very good !
I love how you use your words, its delicious to read .

[CorruptSaint]

It's a good starting point if not a little short for a chapter. I feel this would be better as perhaps a prologue rather than a set chapter unless you are willing to write a tad more as it comes across as a paragraph. Some rather nice description. I like the Meredith charachter she seems quite eccentric but I feel that the charachters are too set in stone from this point.

We know Meredith is eccentric and we know Alli is the girl that is perhaps more of a loner due to her looks. Thus it would be hard to expand from there on out but I feel if you carried writing this it would become better. I like the idea you have and good luck with your writing.

[Alex Thomas]

Very interesting start. Meredith's and Alli's personalities are already very defined. Parts are bit blunt, but it can always be trimmed up. The ending also seems a bit incomplete. Try to start sentences in different ways than with the subject, maybe a preposition or a participial phrase. I'll be looking forward to more of this piece.