Chapter 1./My lullaby

When i was 3 years old ,my dad passed away from cancer,Me and my mom have been living Difficult Ever since...

I entered the school building, a couple of girls looked at me, and i heard them whispering
"That's Emily Whiner.. the one without the dad, yeah" and then they started chanting "Mrs. Whiner, the Minor ,Without a father ,poor daughter..!!" They laughed. Some people would feel bad for me, but i learned to tune it out. "Hi. Im so tired.." I said to my Best friend, Sarah
"You're always tired emily! and what no hi?" Sarah said
"Ha.. Hi.. and yes i'm always tired! so?" I said, The bell rang "See you in 2nd period!" I yelled across the hallway. When i entered 1st period my teacher look straight at my eye ,and gestured with her hands to come meet her
"Yes Mrs.Rutter?" I said  "You still haven't paid for the field trip ,its next week emily..."Mrs.Rutter said
"Yes i understand the concern but  me and my mother-"I stopped ,i was afraid to tell any teacher, correction, any adult, that me and my mother are having difficulties with money at home, i was afraid because they might call child protection service ,and take me away..
"Are trying our best to turn in the money i always forget.." i lied "Emily.. write it down somewhere i can't afford to not have you go this field trip is going to start off the rest of the unit.. you will be lost.."Mrs. Rutter explained  " i understand give me until Monday please..." I begged
"Fine until Monday..." Mrs. Rutter said. "EVERYBODY TO THERE SEATS... including you mrs. Whiner..." Mrs. Rutter demanded i followed her ordered, and made my way to my seat i looked at the rest of the chairs.. im surrounded with a bunch of guys! i saw them trying to break dance.. "Boys take your seats now" Mrs. Rutter said with a rough voice, that even vampires are going to have nightmares from.. they ran over to take there seats, giggling like 3, 4 year old girls doing make-up. I rolled my eyes i looked across the room 3 of my friends sat across the room Martha, Bethany, And Steve..
"Today we are going to be talking about Greek Mythology.. who knows what some of the greek gods are?" Mrs. Rutter asked One of the guys i sat next with raised there hands "Hercules!" Said Mark "Correct" Said Mrs. Rutter. Well this would never end, all i could think about all day is, how bad i felt for my mom, she an only parent ,raising a child, going through such a phase, and yet she didn't treat me unfairly, at least not yet anyways, all i think is i'm going to give her a hard time when im older i can just see it.
Why won't this torture end? Why is my life this difficult, Never mind i shouldn't think that way i should be grateful for what i got.


School day ended, i hope i get to go to the field trip, i only have until Monday. When i came home, my mom was sitting on the couch with her legs crossed ,i knew she had something important to tell me. She looked at me, her eyelids probably heavy. "Honey come sit next to me". "Ok m-mother" i said stuttering. i was nervous ,to nervous to think.
"Im getting married" my mom blurted out letting out all her breath. she froze staring at me. "I didn't even know you were dating" i said appalled. "why" i said barley a whisper.
"im in love, and he isn't that rich but he lives in a town house better than this place , and he can pay for your field trip" she said, trying to persuade me "NO! i don't want anything from that miserable imposter!"  i yelled running away to my room. How could my mom replace my dad, did she have no heart? My life is truly coming to an end,  my mother? replace my father? Then again i never saw him, but he is the one that made me happen, shouldn't my mom be grateful to? Oh! This is just great.

I woke up, tired (of course) barley getting any sleep besides the crying, i had a couple nightmares that kept me up. How could she? When...? Then it struck me when? today?Tomorrow? Next year? I ran out of the room searching for my mom, i looked everywhere then i went to the kitchen. My mom turned around holding a plate of eggs she was smiling. i was with a serious face "when are you getting married?" i said without a smirk on my face. "next month march 9th." my mother said. i was always a "good girl" but theres sometimes when you need to put your foot down "GO TO HELL!!" i yelled stomping away before i did i caught a glimpse of my mom , shocked her mouth wide open, yet her look , looked understand, Sure my mother isn't being understanding, i bet as soon as i give in she will get made at me, all this is bull s**t.


On monday morning before school my mom gave me 50$ for the field trip "Where'd you get the money?" i asked "My fiance.. of course i told you!" my mother said joyfully
i threw it on the ground "I said i didn't want anything from him" i said while my teeth were clinched. and i left the house slamming the door shut. when i entered first period. my teacher was looking at me, i knew what to do. i went toward her "do you have the money?" Mrs. Rutter asked " No i don't" i said "I'm very disappointed in you, guess you're not coming" Mrs. Rutter said " i guess so" i said as i walked away, i whispered " i don't give a f**k" , Does mrs. rutter actually think i give a f**k , my life is falling apart.

When school was over i headed home when i saw my mom, i saw her with some guy, i think he's the "fiance" " Honey this is robert my finace" my mom introduced. i raised my eyebrow "Hi" i said " Well hello there your mother told me everything about you" he said
i ignored him and walked to my room. Ugh! why, why? did she bring him home when i obviously don't like him! i didn't even like the idea of them dating let alone getting married! Well she never mentioned him before until they got engaged! I wonder what he'll have to say about that!

I woke up the morning of march 9th. I groaned ,why me ? My mother ran inside my room "won't you get  dressed honey? you have an important role!" My mom said " Im the flower girl!" i yelled . My mom left the room. As soon as i got dressed i went down stairs, " Ready honey?" My mother yelled enthusiastically "Been ready, but not excited" I groaned. I slowly put on the heels, they're not the most "cute" shoes in the world, their totally white, but at the heel there is a huge flower, ew. i strapped them on whispering under my breath "this is not what i prayed for"

"What is that honey?" My mother asked, sarcastically. " Oh nothing" i lied.
we opened the door, hearing a loud squeak (which im used to) "Can't wait to say good bye to this he- place" My mother "almost" said "Nice save, and  i would miss, you have no heart" i said with a little bit of regret in my tone.
"Honey! this is my day, do you mind being understanding?" My mother expressed her selfishness towards me. I groaned silently, why won't she understand?

My mother got in the car, front seat and yelled "Bye, I will never see this dirty HOUSE AGAIN!" my mother yelled at the top of her lungs.The car was driving normally, as usually but i didn't want that, i wanted not to get to the wedding. Ugh, my life has ended, why you ask? just ask my mother.

When we made it to the wedding, i was the least bit excited! I mean my mom was marrying a stranger, i bet she doesn't even love him, i bet  she did it for the money!
My mother told me to wait behind the grand doors, before she makes the grand entrance i have to walk to the tune of the piano, throwing pedals of flowers. I sat down, looking around she was getting married in the church, she didn't marry dad in the church! I looked around and their was giant statues of angels, flawless, priceless too. the windows were made out of painted glass, colors were red and green. Odd colors they are.Then they showed me my cue. I stood up and walked silenty and they opened the door for me.

"Thank you" i whispered gently i kept walking picking up pedal after pedal after pedal. This was boring. i looked around the audience, most of these people were "Roberts" family, they didn't look to happy. Hey, who's complaining? I hate the idea of my mom marrying a- Man. I just followed the tune of the step.

As soon as the ceremony was over, My head ached, i was feeling light headed, Oh, boy. "Honey!! IM MARRIED! this is the happiest day of my life" My mother yelled
Yeah well for me- THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE! ironic isn't it?