Prologue

As the saliva slid off of her tongue and hit the cracked dirt beneath her, she swore she heard it sizzle. The hot, humid air made it hard to breathe, suffocating her as she tried to decipher all the smells around her : fresh grass, tiny dung beetles skittering under the rocks, falling leaves. Beneath it all, a minuscule metallic stench. Blood.

            Looking up, she caught her father grinning around the deer’s throat in his mouth. Well, it was more a baring of teeth than a grin. Human mannerisms are hard to carry once shifted.

            His gentle purr guided her as she leapt forward, bounding through the meadow, crushing tiny flowers and bending the tall grass. Her mother always told her that she need to be lighter on her feet but her paws were too big for her gangling limbs. Where was she anyway?

            Father let out a startled yelp as a flash of gold and black pounced on him, forcing him to drop his kill. They rolled around a bit before sitting upright to lick and nuzzle each other. Purring happily, she sniffed curiously at the dead deer because even as a panther a ripped out jugular is a better view than seeing your parents kiss. Disgusting.

            Her father nipped at her ear, distracting her from the gruesome sight below her. She turned swiftly, with her bottom raised in the air, tail swishing wildly, and a bubbling growl in my throat. Her dad swiped at her gently with his paw as he not- so-gently trapped her under its massive weight. She rolled onto her stomach and nipped at the pads of his paw as he yawned, much to her aggravation, and laid down lazily.

            Her mother padded along, stopping before her father, giving him that ‘mom’ look that somehow transcends species. He rolled his grey eyes before releasing his daughter to tumble into her mother’s feather-soft undercoat. She nuzzled the top of her head swiping a lick across it, simultaneously flattening the strands from their frayed state and releasing the dirt caked in.

            “Amira?”

            She startled, turning her head towards the voice. A human boy stared down at her, curiosity brimming in his amber eyes. She crouched, haunches raised, feeling brave with her parents around. Who is this kid?

            “They’re coming, Amira,” the boy rasps. He jolts forward, collapsing to his knees, unruly brown curls falling haphazardly around his alarmed face. “They’re coming.”

            A shriek pierced the air and Amira felt the ground shake beneath her paws. “What?” The human word formed awkwardly in her feline mouth. “What’s happening?” The words gargled in her throat as broken growls. Dark clouds rolled in and lightning streaked across the sky as a stark ringing fills the space around her. The ground shook harder and she looked around frantically for her parents who had disappeared with the arrival of the storm.

            And there they were. Her breath caught in her throat. She didn’t see or hear anything else; her focus zeroed in on their bodies, strewn next to the deer, torn apart just as ruthlessly and yet -. 

            The deer was meant to die. Nature dictates they’re kind to kill those weaker. Her parents weren’t just killed. They were murdered. Throats ripped out without hesitation. Blood-matted pelts. Mauled.

            “You have to choose.”

            My mouth opens to scream but my voice is gone. Instead, the ringing pushes past my throat, louder than before.

            “Amira!”

Reviews

[Jo Billygoat]

I loved it. Has great potential. Appears you have unfortunately stumbled onto the classic writer's block. Be patient it will come. Should you try to force it you could ruin a great thing you have started or get so frustrated you give up on it for good.

You definitely have the skill and potential to be a great writer. Hope you stick with it. I like the suggestion Be made even though you mentioned panther instead of wolf in your writing. Maybe Amira escapes into the wild and pairs up with another species or several species in her adventures of survival. You could go super future and have her in a zoo that was a wild habitat and per her parents violation of killing the deer she was deported to another world that was more fight for survival oriented. You could have her and the human boy run off and venture life together.

Hopefully these suggestions do not add to your confusion.

[EssenceofDaringx]

Thanks for reviewing! I have been wondering what to do with this for what seems like ever! Hopefully i can carry the same energy throughout the story when I get around to writing it!

[Konspiracy]

Well, this is certainly something new. I always love female characters that aren't your typical mary-sue super models with random assassin training attached to them. This is beautifully unique.

This is gonna be an amazing journey. I can tell.

[BL]

With her parents dead the only choice for Amira, half wolf - half woman is to follow the human boy and join the world of the humans. That's the story I'm getting and as I'm writing my own story it proves I want to find out what actually happens. You have put a lot into this, it'll be interesting to see if you can continue that in Chapter 1.

[EssenceofDaringx]

Hey, thanks for the review! I've been really struggling about where to take this story because my mind is going in so many different directions, but I think you just helped me, or made it worse lol.

[Jim]

I'm at work so unfortunately I don't have much time to read here but I had a quick glance at all of your writings. This was the first one I read through and I liked your way of writing at this prologue.

I have a real fascination of wild life, especially big cats get me going. The story gave a good sense of the space and time and I was soon wanting more and more, meaning that the story builds up very nicely, growing by as you read it. I hope that I will be able to read your stuff more.

[EssenceofDaringx]

Thanks for taking the time to stop by and leave a review! I hope I can continue to deliver!

[Autonomous]

At first, I was surprised to see you use a type of Bambi story but to be truthful you superseded my expectations with this prologue. Not that you yourself didn't impress me as an author and I don't mean to diss you in any way but I really didn't think there was a lot of people that could get away with a story about animals and make it good. I will be patiently awaiting the next chapter but for now, I will give you a full rating.

[EssenceofDaringx]

Hey thanks for the review! I'm glad that I could impress you my friend and I hope I will continue to do so!

[Nen Dellera]

Hello! I finally got the time to check this out!

I'd like to say that this was an interesting prologue. It kind of gave me a sense of foreboding, which is kind of the perfect bait for me. Although, at some parts, i was confused what POV you were using. Mostly you used God's eye or 3rd omniscient, and at some first person when you used "my." Your vocab is great as well as your style.

"Looking up, she saw her father grins around deer's neck..." i think you should change it to "grinning" or something. But i don't know.

Your imagery is great, too. I'll keep reading and see where this leads

[EssenceofDaringx]

Hey, thanks for the review! Actually, before I added this on here the POV was in first person and I went through and changed it to third. Obviously I wasn't thorough enough, lol. I'll fix it though!

[Nen Dellera]

hehehe...I've had the same experience ones, so don't worry, you're not alone

[EssenceofDaringx]

I think I fixed it!

[Nen Dellera]

It's better! Although you forgot to add "was" in the "She startled..." after the human called her Amira. But that's the only error I noticed, so don't fret about it