Word Soup

Most moms tell their children not to play with their food, but they never say anything of playing with words...

I'm feeling all
poemy.
I don't know where to
Begin.
And herein lies the sin.
As I sit here and wait,
My breath, it bates
Itself.
Waiting for the words to tumble.
Waiting for the inspiration.
What to write?
To what right?
I fret.
I forget.
The dance of the poet.
It's all hurry up and wait.
Joy!
And pain.
A
tangledjumbleofstraightlines.
Words pull like a vine.
Here, I'm trying to unwind.
I'm all untwined.
All unhinged.
Here, I feel a twinge.
(Of regret)
For the lessons I'll forget.
Carelessly
I
Dictate
That you manipulate
Extrapolate
Word associations.
Brief abbreviations.
Reckless punctuations.
Careless ministrations.
Insiduous registrations.
Wordy intoxication.
This dance is fun.
I feel as if it's just begun.
Tap, tap, tap on the keys,
Words falling as they please.
Magically, on the page they end up,
And then, just as abrupt,
They
Just
Stop
.

Reviews

[SweetPeachesAlways]

I love this! Perfect! Wow! Love IT!
Hey, Haden, thanks for putting this in your faves, because if I hadn't of read that, I might NOT have gotten the chance to read, enjoy, and save this mega-beauty in my Faves!
Beautiful write, my dear, simply beautiful!

[Haden]

this is definitely going in my faves. guess we all feel the same.
the middle,
"Word associations.
Brief abbreviations.
Reckless punctuations.
Careless ministrations.
Insiduous registrations.
Wordy intoxication. "
is awesome - you can hear it being read, it's got a kick-a*s cadence about it. but, what i liked best:
"poemy" oh yes, beatiful word! i feel "poemy" - it should be a mood on myspace.
you think the writing will never come and then it just does.
my only suggestion (which you're free to ignore cuz no one else had a pblm with it) i would get rid of the "just" before "stop". only because you use it in the line above, the repetition was a little distracting, and i think that removing it makes the stop even more abrupt.
beatiful writers mantra!

[Robert Luna]

I really liked this and thought it was very creative. You have pushed the lines of normality and knocked the dust off the formal style with this. I love to see a writer work within their own ideas of what is abd should be and not fall victim to trying to force the flow of thoughts into something that has no life of its own. You have written something different and wonderful here.

Great Job!!!!!

[deadlife]

i love the music in it.
beautiful.
words are flowing..slowly and slowly....deep...into me....raising high...and falling down....
i can feel it...the flow...very much poignant.......an awesome write.

thanks for sharing.

regards
rupam

[Ryan D. Mosley]

Wow, great job on this piece. Wonderful voice in it. This truly shows the creation of a poem. "Tap tap tap on the keys": a wonderful line. Overall: Good Job!

[Blackbirdsong]

This poem feels like it was meant to be read out loud. Your poetic voice is quite strong. There is a program you can get called evoca which some of the spoken word writers on site use so that they can read with their works on here much like they'd do at a poetry reading. You might want to look into that. Great work here.