Patience

This was written long ago, and time has since come to an abrupt end.

“Patience,” said she,

The woman of my dreams.

“Be patient,

Someday he will know:

How the heart beats stead’ly beneath tender skin

How life ends

With the cease

Of that push

And that flow.

Some day he will see

That the sun, in the sea,

Is mere reflection of its place

In the sky

And then he will know

Like all of us should know

That all waters are the same

As the tears that we cry.

Patience.

For there will once come a time

When he will seek the meaning

Of your rhythm and your rhyme…”

“I’m all right,” said I,

Looking up, eyes dry

“My heart pulses steady "

I know it, this time.

With the strong beat of rhythm

With the patience "

Of rhyme

And maybe someday he will count

Every tear

Of the Rhine…

“But to be patient,”

I whispered

As my mother closed the door,

To leave me to dream forever and for more "

“To be patient is a virtue

Too selfless to be mine.

For patience can only last

Until the end of time.”

September 22, 2009

Author's Note

This poem is very close to my heart. And although looking back 3.5 years later as a much better poet I see the imperfections clearly, I won't ever change a thing.

Reviews

[Rahul]

That;s really a great write, i really don't have Patience to get things what i want, what i need...lol :)
i liked this write and last stanza's well written with a great ending and starting's also nice reading and i totally loved this write. Keep writing :)

[Sarah Khalil]

Thanks! :)

[Angi]

I love that you won't change a thing, Sarah. I am never satisfied with my work. Ever. I need to have patience with myself! Angi~

[ILuvRilke]

Patience, rhythm, meaning.....whispers, dreams, time.....selfless, virtue....we are all the same, find your place.....I love your words and thoughts

[Sarah Khalil]

Thanks! :)

[Lethu]

This poem is flawless. We're often not satisfied with our own works and that's a human aspect we can't easily overlook regardless of the pat in the back but then again, it's what makes us good writers and artists and oh - - I just have to say that I love the third stanza. This is a good piece I say.

[Sarah Khalil]

Why thank you! It's reassuring to know that people think highly of my work, especially this piece.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Some day he will see
That the sun, in the sea,
Is mere reflection of its place
In the sky

These are my favorite lines...I absolutely love the imagery here.

This entire piece is a great metaphor for life...we must be patient and kind if we expect the same in return, and even if things end, we will always have the memories of these beautiful times.

A few little "imperfections" in the wording, line breaks, etc., but as you said in your comments section it is close to you, so I wouldn't go messing around with it. This is a beautiful moment in time.

[Sarah Khalil]

I'm glad that you were able to come away with a positive message from this poem, as I was in quite a negative place when I wrote it! Thank you for your review!

[marty360]

I loved the speech and how (to me) it seemed out of place but that made it fit. If that makes sense?
The last stanza is a personal favourite.

[Sarah Khalil]

The speech is somewhat out of place, people don't really talk like that - and I certainly don't! It's definitely supposed to just be a very delicate, purposely poetic version of something that was very really present at the time.

[marty360]

Well you have pulled it off :)

[SyberRose]

A beautiful sensitive write Sarah...loved the last verse and thank you for posting...Rose;)

[Sarah Khalil]

Thanks so much Rose, this piece is one of the closest to me.

[Nayan]

Love your last stanza! Absolute poetry!

“To be patient is a virtue
Too selfless to be mine.
For patience can only last
Until the end of time.”

The way you wrote about the reflection of the sun on the seas, and of the drops of waters being all the same, and of the tender heart beats, and of your dreaming forever when your mother closed the door... - I felt these are the ripples of innocent thoughts on the waters of your imagination!

Very nicely penned! Don't see a reason why you should try to change it. The first write is always so special for all of us! :) Keep writing more...

[Sarah Khalil]

My goodness, what a beautiful review. Thank you so much!

[Nayan]

You are welcome Sarah!

[zainul]

Great write in terms of meaning even with imperfections.:)

[Sarah Khalil]

Thank you!

[zainul]

You are welcome!