The Voice

losing your voice can be embarrassing in more than one way

Demi’s arm snaked out fom under the duvet and her hand groped blindly for the offending thing on the bedside table, trying to silence it. She finally located it, snatched it and stabbed the snooze button before it woke her husband up..

“Aaaargh!” groaned Bruce, beside her.

Too late!

Bruce turned to his wife and yawned, revealing two beautiful tonsils. He smiled sheepishly at her.

“Good morning, Beautiful,” he said groggily.

Demi smiled back and said: “?????????”

No sound came out of her pretty mouth. She mouthed ‘good morning’ but nothing came out. Fear showed on her lovely face and she tried again. Still nothing. Bruce was clearly amused.

“What’s up, Gorgeous? Cat got your tongue?”

“Miaw,” went Tabby, at the foot of the bed, which, if you’re not versed in cat speak, means: I have nothing to do with it.

“You know, you look like Nemo with the sound muted.”

Demi swallowed, wet her lips, cleared her throat and tried again.

“S**t!” she managed to whisper.

“Honey, I’m not surprised you’re voiceless, today. Not after last night’s karaoke. You should’ve picked an easier song than Whitney Huston’s ‘I’ll always love you.”

“Fery funny,” hissed Demi.

“Tell you what, I’ll mix you some warm honey and a squeeze of lemon. It should do the trick. Go and take your shower."

Demi's shoulders slumped. She sighed and trudged towards the bathroom, looking dejected. Bruce went to the kitchen, singing “I’ll always looooooove youuuu.”

********

 

Demi held the glass with both hands and scrunched her face.

“Come on,” said Bruce, “you’re being childish.”

Demi took a tentative sip and grimaced.

“Go on, Demi, more.”

She gulped down the content of the glass and shuddered.

“There’s a good girl,” cheered Bruce, “now off you go or you’ll be late for work.”

“Work?” hissed Demi, “you think I…” She tried to clear her throat and continued:

“I’m showing a house to a customer. I’ll neet to explain thinks. I wish I knew sign lankuage. No, I’ll ask Petty to cofer for me then I’ll ko to the trukstore to ket somethink for this tamn nuisance. One think is sure. No more karaoke.”

                                                   *********

Demi rang the bell and thought: “I hope Doug’s not home. I couldn’t stand his leering and his innuendos. Not this morning.” In her head, the words were perfect.

Doug, her friend’s husband, never tried to hide his attraction to her. He never missed an opportunity to come on to her. Ok, she felt flattered but, still…

The door was opened by Doug. He beamed when he saw who was on the stoop.

“Why, hello, Angel face!” he greeted her, lust in his eyes.

“Is Petty home?” she whispered.

Doug cast a furtive glance over her shoulder and whispered back:

“No, she’s not. Come in, come in!” And stepped back, opening the door wide to let her in.

Author's Note

still struggling to come back. don't know if this is any good.

Reviews

[LastMonth]

Great Dialogue writing.
Great representation of someone losing their voice.

Going to join the others and say the Twist at the end is a bit hard to understand, would love clarification :O

But again, superb writing. You really got me trying to imitate her voiceless speaking to see how similar it would be. (With all the K's.)

[Woody]

thank you so much for your kind words LM.
when you whisper, certain sounds become what is called in linguistics "voiceless".
b,d,g,v,th,z (as in this) become p,t,k,f,th,s (as in think) that's why Demi's talk is so strange. Betty becomes Petty, for instance.
that damn ending that didn't come out as I was hoping.
when Demi asked her question, Doug had no way of knowing that she'd lost her voice and thought she was being conspiratorial so he whispered back: no, she's not. come in! thinking she finally relented and came to...
glad you enjoyed it all the same.

[Shabeeh Haider]

Haha. A whisper misunderstood.
It's not what we say but how we say it that matters

[Woody]

spot on, Haider! haha
thank you my friend. sorry about the late response. I'll definitely get to your page when I have time.

[Country boy183798]

I honestly didn't want this story to end! Very engaging, and very funny and clever! Just like usual, you've done it again, brilliant job!

[Woody]

thanks heaps Edmund. I'll definitely add to it. but you have to understand that I needed to end it on a punchline. probably not so obvious.
you've spoilt me today, thanks again. it's only natural that I review you back.

[barleygirl]

Very realistic-sounding dialogue & morning routine. I'm a little surprised Demi tried to speak as much as she did & I wondered about using the aide of a notepad!??!?! Your twist wasn't as impactful as yours usually are . . . the reason (for me) is that you kinda rushed thru the explanation of Doug's horndog ways . . . the ending might've popped more if you took a few extra moment to draw out the situation between them (in your delightfully graphic way) before opening the door.

[Woody]

I believe you are the second person to tell me that the ending's rushed. can't be a coincidence. you must be right. I'll definitely work on it a bit more.
thank you dear for stopping to read and thoughtfully review.
tell you the truth, the notepad never crossed my mind. wouldn't have been funny, though.

[Bacchus]

Poor girl. Very funny though!

[Woody]

thanks a lot Bacchus :) yep, when you've lost your voice, you'd better stay at home :)

[Bacchus]

You might like my Childless Reverie poem too- love when the last lines get you!

[Woody]

on my way :)

[Sir Drift & Mr. Pulse]

This is really good. Don't know why you stopped, I was really getting into it. I love "?????" That really caught to me, I'm gonna have to borrow it but I would take out the -No sound came out of her pretty mouth- I would want readers to guess what "?????" Would sound like so scratch that, let them try to figure it out. Another thing, before the 3rd scene, in the husbands dialogue, is he supposed to talk like that? I don't know if you did it on purpose. Well, thanks for the story

[Woody]

thanks a lot, Sir for yet another good review.
the story could go on but I wanted to end it on a punch line. I hope you caught it :) so the rest can be left to the reader. my guess is she must've hit him on the head and called him "perv".
but I think you're right about the question marks. however, when I put ???? I thought how's the reader going to interpret that? is he going to think that she's puzzled? how do you put on paper a "no sound"? that's why I added that bit.
second scene: husbands do talk likee that. I wish you'd tell me what you found strange. besides, there's a little reference to a certain actress. have you seen it?
thanks again, Sir :)

[Sir Drift & Mr. Pulse]

a reference? was it Petty? I saw it was written in a different font, on purpose? yeah the end is a punch line.

[Woody]

the Italics just means she's whispering.
the reference. the man's called Bruce and the woman, Demi. ring any bells?
when he asks her to drink up he says: "come on Demi, more"

[Sir Drift & Mr. Pulse]

you sly dog you, I just got it, of course Demi Moore and Bruce. Didnt catch it at first.

[Woody]

haha I often slip in little references to singers, writers... some reviewers see them, some don't.

[Kaliope]

Such a joy to read, as always! I did need a second attempt to get the ending though. I think the main problem was that after you jumped to a new scene, I had no idea that Demi was standing in front of Petty's house, so I kept wondering where she was and why and in the process entirely missed the point. But that was probably my pre-caffeine stupor. Don't read before your first morning coffee - I should probably stick that somewhere onto my wall.
But hey, on the other hand I got the "Demi, mo(o)re" - "Bruce" reference! please tell me that was intentional, otherwise my day would be ruined! ;-)
In any case, I wish we had more writers like you that know how to brighten up one's day. It can get a little broody around here, but I guess I'm doing my share of broody fiction... okay, next one is gonna be fun again. I'll stick that resolution onto my wall, right next to the coffee reminder :-D

[Woody]

haha now, YOU made my day, Kaliope. thank you. I'm sooo glad I helped brighten your day.
I'm well aware that those who are new to my page and not used to my quirky mind do sometimes miss my silly little things and references to people, songs...
oh yes, Demi and Bruce were intentional. why would I choose a name like Demi, otherwise? why not something nice like Kaliope for instance?
here's a hint. if a character's name looks funny (not Demi and Bruce, though) look twice. chances are I'm being my silly self again.

[Woody]

oh and one more thing. please don't read my stories before you've had your caffeine fix. I'm not saying they're deep, but you know what I mean.

[Kaliope]

I sure do and I swear I'm usually smarter ;-)

[Woody]

damn well you're smart!!!! you're the only one who picked on the names.

[Samuel Dickens]

Te-he, you sly devil, you. I guess I'm a bit slow today, reading the ending twice, as I did. It seems things are going Doug's way. If Demi says "No" will he even hear her? A fine, humorous tale, written by a guy who's always sharp of wit.

[Woody]

haha I'm not sure he'll hear her. he must be thinking she's finally relented.
thanks a lot Sam for your gracious compliment.

[Katrina Mckeown]

I do like to see a writer with a sense of Humour, ! Well done a very capturing write, ! ☺

[Woody]

thanks loads fpr taking the time Katrina. glad you appreciate my sense of humour :)

[Katrina Mckeown]

☺ no worries thanks for sharing. ....👍