at the vet's

Some people can be a little too sentimental with pets

 Jonathan was sitting on a bench in the neon-lit corridor of the veterinarian’s office. His elbows were resting on his knees, his head in his hands, eyes fixed on the ground, following the progress of an ant dragging a crumb and doing the moon walk. That morning, Jonathan had found his beloved cat lying by the entrance door, barely breathing. Heart pounding, he’d rushed her to the vet’s.

The swinging doors at the end of the corridor opened and a young doctor came striding out in his unbuttoned white uniform, a stethoscope draped over his shoulders. Jonathan looked at him expectantly. The doctor smiled thinly and stretched his hand.

“Dr. Mortis. Rhyger Mortis”

“Hello, Doctor. What’s the news?” asked Jonathan in a tremulous voice. Dr. Mortis shook his head and tried to look sympathetic.

“I’m afraid there was nothing I could do for your cat. I’m sorry for your loss”.

Jonathan swiftly put his head in his hands and started to sob uncontrollably. Dr. Mortis patted him on the back like a mother trying to burp her baby. He took him gently by the arm and ushered him into his office. Overwhelming grief in public always embarrassed him. 

Jonathan raised his head. His face was streaked with tears, his eyes red-rimmed and snot was streaming from his nostrils. Gross, if you ask me.

“What.. what.. k.. ki.. killed her, D..Doc?” (Oh, God! Pathetic, I know).

Dr. Mortis offered him a tissue and said “Curiosity”.

Author's Note

just a tiny little thing for fun. been quite lethargic of late, so I hope this'll help me get back on track.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

This is hilarious! Everything clicks for me this time (despite being one of those "too sentimental" ones!) I love the doctor's name, perfectly spelled to both hide & reveal. I loved the ant doing the moon walk. I love the pat on the back like mother burping baby. I love the realistic depiction of snotty cry, along with snide observation. Last & certainly not least, your twist was perfectly executed & funny as hell.

[Woody]

awww B! I'm chuffed as nuts. thanks a bunch. you're a doll :) I know how much you love animals so I made this one die peacefully in its sleep.

[barleygirl]

Didn't mean to chuff yer nuts, but I hope it was pleasurable! *tee! hee!*

[Woody]

my wife's just walked in and wanted to know why I had a stupid grin fixed on my face. does that mean pleasurable?

[Samuel Dickens]

Well, Woody, you've now shown us the first confirmed case of feline death by curiosity. I'm wondering, though, if Kitty might have just eaten too many of those Fancy Fukushima fishy treats.

[Woody]

and that's when the expression was coined!!!
a fishy treat called "Curiosity"? I wouldn't put it past those little men :)
thanks for the visit, Sam.

[emmajoy]

LOVE IT Almost every line made me laugh or giggle! As for that last word.. well, clever you! Great name for the vet - almost evil in intention.

However, did note amongst the fun some super sweet phrases, '.. an ant dragging a crumb and doing the moon walk... ' and '.. . 'doctor smiled thinly. '

[Woody]

thank you so very much Emma. praise from a full-blooded English is humbling. I'm but a small student of such great comedians as Rowan Atkinson and John Cleese, to name but those two.

[emmajoy]

Yes, certainly! And could add more but, recommending personal comedy choices to folk can turn out to be a tragedy!

[Will Neill]

Woody, brilliant! A great twist on a well known proverb.. Loved the vets name as well.
Nice one as ever. Will

[Woody]

thanks heaps, Will. I'm so fortunate to have found this site and met wonderful writers from whom I could learn: yourself, roark, Sam, Marie, to name but a few.

[Will Neill]

The pleasure is always mine.
Will

[roarke]

just write, write anything. That's the only remedy. You set the scene superbly, I liked the ant moon walking description. I think the doctors name was a bit over-kill... oops puns are catching... hahaahahahhaa. Curiosity killed the cat... a cliche, yet... your story illustrates mankind's lemming-like way of not learning from repetitive behaviors, hence your ribald wit is going to carve the proverbial turkey. Just write Woody.

[Woody]

Gee thanks a lot roarke. your visits are always like a breath of fresh air. if you think the doctor's name was overkill, I trust your judgement. a bit ibvious.
thanks for the tip :)

[Sharon Kim]

Funny! I love the descriptions and the doctor's name. Great write, Woody! You are great at painting a scene!

[Woody]

thanks a lot, Dear. I'm reading your review and looking at your picture. have you taking a selfie while reading the story? :) glad you like it.

[Woody]

taken not taking. I'm embarrassed :(

[Sharon Kim]

You're welcome! and nope, no new selfies! :)

[Sharon Kim]

No embarrassment needed-it was a typo. :) If it makes you feel better, whenever I use you're, I say the words "you are" to make sure I use the correct word.

[Cory Barrett]

Fun to read! Thanks for thAt!

[Woody]

and thank YOU for stopping by. glad you think it's funny.

[Claire in VA]

Hahaha! Too funny. When I spotted
the title I passed over it once or twice.
Then, sighing, I clicked on it, ready
and willing to write a feisty review!
I am thrilled that I didn't need to.
Love the doctor's name as well as
the ending. Clever, indeed!
~Claire

[Woody]

thanks a lot Caire. I'm so happy you found it funny :)

[Mudaliar]

Seriously, when I started reading this, I didn't where's it headed. But boy!!! perfect ending. Great work!

[Woody]

you're too kind, Mudaliar. thank you very much

[Baby Ricochet]

Good story with a funny ending. Good job

[Woody]

thank you so much Baby. glad you like it.

[Kieta!]

HAHAHAHA this is really good!!! xD I love the 'Dr. Rhyger Mortis' and I loved that the cause of death was curiosity... a very perfect and humorous short story; great job!!!! :D

[Woody]

thanks heaps, Kieta. I'm so happy when my silly stories make people laugh :)
lovely pic. keep him/her away from mischief. Dr. Mortis is on the prowl :)

[Kieta!]

Hahahaha :)