Bass

Two buddies drinking and chewing the fat, at sunset.

We were sitting on the porch, with cold pina coladas ; mine on the wicker coffee table, covered in beads of cold sweat reflecting the rays of the dying sunset; his, cradled in his hands. The fragrance of the jasmine tree permeated the whole place whenever a gentle breeze blew our way. The girls had hit town some time ago on a shopping spree and we were certainly enjoying the reprieve. You know women.

It was one of those serene moments of the day when flies have quit work for the day and the mosquitoes haven’t taken over yet. 

Malcolm was my best friend. We’d known each other since grade school. Oh, we’d had our fair share of fights and squabbles but only the good memories stayed with me. Malcolm passed on last summer. The big C. Scourge of the century. I was devastated as you can imagine.

“Nice out, isn’t it”, I told him.

“Yeah”, he concurred casually, “but put it away; the girls may come back any minute”. 

I nearly choked on my drink as I burst out laughing. That’s Malcolm for you. Quick on the uptake and always ready for a laugh. When the laughter subsided, he took a sip of his drink and said:

“You know, there’s something strange that’s happened to me that I’ve never told you about. I didn’t think you’d believe me.”

“Go ahead”, I said. “Try me”.

“That time you and Sylvie went to Tunisia for your summer holiday”.

“Yes?”

“Well, one day, I went fishing on the pier. It was quite hot that day. I took off my shirt, threw my line in the water and leaned on the railing and settled for the wait. Four bloody hours, mate. Not as much as a sardine!”

“Well?” I said, “You can hardly call that a world-shaking event”.

“Hear me out”, he went on. “That day, I dropped my watch in the water. The one Marlyne gave me for my 60^th birthday”.

“Ok”, I said, not knowing where that was going. “I’m sorry to hear that but a watch is a w..”

“I know”, he interrupted impatiently, “ here’s the strange part. The next day, I returned to the same spot, hoping to strike lucky. And sure enough, as I was holding my rod..”

I looked at him with mock astonishment.

“Fishing rod, silly. And then I felt a tug on the line. I immediately jerked..”

“YOU WHAT?” I exclaimed.

“Jerked my line out of the water, you crazy fool.”

“Oh, all right. And what did you catch?”

“The biggest effing bass I’d ever seen. I wished you’d been there to see it. Anyway, I took it home and, God is my witness, when Marleyne was cleaning it, she didn’t find the watch.” 

Reviews

[roarke]

They have Bass in Tunisia? The first two paragraphs are the grabber. At that point you know you are reading something special. I like how you write humanity. something I can't or won't do....sounds like old Malcolm hadn't changed much after death. Which might be the message of the story. Not sure. When ya talk with the dear departed, there's gotta be a message somewhere.... I think. Sometimes a piece of a story found has more to it on the second look. Was Marleyne always helping Malcolm find stuff, was he forgetful or accident prone and she always helped him out? Was the narrator supposed to be there that day Malcolm went fishing and lost his watch? I'm just shooting at blind ducks in the dark, but maybe there's more to this tale?????

[Woody]

thanks for taking the time, Roarke. awfully kind of you.
Yes we do have bass in Tunisia. it's the Mediterranean.
you may be giving the story more credit than it deserves. my main objective is to entertain and I'm quite aware that I could make it more worthy of the reader's time if I added more details concerning the characters as you have kindly suggested. That would mean a longer story, if I could find the time for that.

[roarke]

ah, understood, but remember the time you find, will be magnificent.

[Valentine]

Too bad she didn't find the watch and feed him to the fishes. Valentine

[Woody]

shoot! you picked one of the handful I'm not particularly proud of, Kathie. a bit off an anti climax at the end. quite the opposite of what I was aiming at. the whole point was to lead the reader into believing that the watch would miraculously turn out inside the fish. ah well, you can't win them all right?
thanks for dropping in K.

[Marie]

THis was kind of a letdown in the end, but at least it didn't end on a cliche.

[Woody]

I tend to agree with you, marie. tell you the truth, I was in two minds whether to post it or not. Well, I never said I was perfect :)

[Roland Corvus]

Good stuff, really paints the picture in the beginning; good for a few chuckles.

[Woody]

thank you very much Roland. glad you like it.