Beetle

thwated kill

Yesterday, as is my habit after eating, I found myself aimlessly strolling in the house, trying to walk off the roast chicken I’d had for lunch and checking the rooms for intruders. I may sound paranoid but, to me, security of the home is paramount. 

Prudence was sleeping upstairs and you could tell the kids were at school from the blissful peace and quiet that permeated the whole place. The only noise I could hear was the ticking of the grandfather clock in the hall and the regular hum of the fridge in the kitchen. I’d just finished my tour and was about to go take a shuteye when I saw this huge beetle lurking by the entrance door. Hairs stood on my nape. Now, I know I’m not squeamish or anything but I simply cannot abide those creepy crawlies with their multiple legs and black carapaces. Makes you wonder why God, in his infinite wisdom, created those abhorrent creatures. Without a second thought, I pounced on the stupid critter, intending to crush it to a pulp when, all of a sudden, little Jude's yellow submarine toy hit me on the back of my head and Mother Mary (Prudence’s mother) yelled from the kitchen door:

“Let it be!”

I never got on well with the woman and I, for one, am sick and tired of her tirades about how all life is sacred on this earth. She then strode into the hall, bent down and wagged her finger at me and said in that irritating voice of hers that she uses when talking to little children:

“Bad boy! I told you once if I told you a thousand times not to mess up the place with dead insects. Go out now, shoo!”

I didn’t say a word. What’s the use? I tucked my tail between my hind legs and, head low, slunk out to the garden. 

Author's Note

try to find the references to five known songs. no swearing if you can't, please.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Well, okay then . . . BEATLES' songs: YESTERDAY, DEAR PRUDENCE, HEY JUDE, & YELLOW SUBMARINE. Then there's LET IT BE (featuring Mother Mary) . . . whew! I actually got this puzzle and I haven't even had my 2nd cup of coffee yet! (It's still quite dark outside for another hour at least!)

The beetle crushing idea reminds me of my experience volunteering in animal shelters for 6 years. I felt like a fraud as an animal lover, becuz these rabid staff members would carry live insects & rodents outside to release them live!!! Not me. My big dilemma is that I hate the sensation of crushing as much as I hate seeing the creatures crawling around.

Thank you for the brain tease . . . I'm almost awake now.

[Woody]

spot on, clever girl! :)
I think we are alike in that I'm quite squeamish when it comes to killing those horrible creatures. BRRR! see the goosebumps? but I can't abide them.
thanks a bunch, B.
dark outside? you're an early riser!

[barleygirl]

Restless dogs wiggling in bed make it impossible to sleep any longer . . . I must get up, let them out to do their morning constitutional, then feed them . . . I'm wide awake, yet they go back to bed for another four hours, while I shiver here in front of the computer . . . *sigh!*

[Woody]

yes I forget you have to tend to the business of your animals. the downside to living on a farm, I suppose.

[Persona]

Would be easier to read if the first paragraph was separated into two. I like the ending.

[Woody]

will do just that. thanks for the read. and I'm glad you liked it.

[John]

Very funny. A nice trail of details leading us to the surprise ending. The story is from the dog's point of view, or it could be the abused son-in-law/husband who feels that he is treated no better than a dog.

[Woody]

thanks a lot John. actually, it was a dog (with a tail and hind legs).
you have no doubt caught the song references.

[Nusquam Esse]

A clever twist at the end; at first I was imagining the MC to be much like my father (paranoid, borderline schizophrenic), but then and again, our dog often behaved like a nutter as well. My only complaint here is that certain bits of the story don't feel natural coming from a dog, although they do certainly make the 'human' aspect seem more legit. Leaves me wondering if the 'twist' is in the end, but a figure of speech.

[Woody]

thanks heaps Nusquam. I actually paid particular attention to make the dog's thoughts vague so not to give the game away.

[LinBin]

fun story well told.........

[Woody]

thank you very much for taking the trouble. glad you like it.

[Roderick Blakeman]

Did the garden belong to an octopus?

Great write, I will read it again later and see how many titles I can spot, it was 7 or 8 on first glance.

My brother is a fanatic, his office/bar has all sorts of posters of the fab four.

[Woody]

thank you Roderick. I never tire of listening to them. England has produced the Beatles, Shakespear and Rowan Atkinson.
yes, I could've fitted in a few more but thought it would be over the top. I like the octopus's garden.

[Susanne]

Love it! Very quirky and interesting. I'm going to read some more of your stories.
Thanks for the review, this is a good idea!

[Woody]

thank you very much, dear. glad you like it :)

[Great Aunt Astri]

THERE IS MORE TO THIS STORY THAN MEETS THE EYE. I DIDN,T GUESS UNTIL THE END, AND THEN ON RE-READING IT I STARTED NOTICING THE REFERENCES. A VERY CLEVER WRITE.

[Woody]

I'm so glad you like it. tribute to my first love, the fab four. thank you for taking the time.

[AMMD]

I didn't suspect the narrator to be anything but a male human until the end. As with "Doctor House", I enjoyed being pulled in by your masterful use of details and sound. I look forward to reading more of your work.

P.S. The English teacher in me MUST point out that you're missing a couple of needed commas, but hey -- (as you well know) I often miss them myself =)

[Woody]

thank you Angeline. yeah, I'm usually careful with the punctuation. silly. I don't often proofread before posting.

[AMMD]

It wasn't until I went back and read other reviews that I noticed The Beatles references. My husband - perhaps their biggest fan - would LOVE it!

[Daffy]

Well, very entertaining. And of course, I feed my p***y cats roast chicken lunches too! A lovely story.

[Woody]

thank you very much Daffy. it's a story that only appeals to lovers of the Beatles, I suppose.

[VALORMORE DE PLUME]

A splendid story for young and old.I was surprised at the end by the lead character. I noticed the references to The Beatles, Prudence, Mother Mary, Let it be, Yellow submarine.

[Woody]

Plus, of course, the title and the very first word "Yesterday" :)
thank you very much Val. Super glad you liked it.