Death...Too Easy

About sorta why I used to cut. I gave it up for so long it no longer helps...

Sites flash in my head without a pause

I slam my head against the wall

I pray to God, "make the pain go away"

The mental images are all too much

 

The pain creeps into my stomach and up my throat

The war rages on in my mind

No thoughts safe from nightmaric soliciting

Ruining the only thing I had going

 

Not needed anymore

Dying slowly in and out

Rotting corpse without a soul

I cry out into the night

Suicide flashes in my mind…all too easy

 

Pulling out my hair in a frantic rage

I don’t understand…what’s happening

Screaming into the night:

“Why God why?”

Rage fills every inch of my body

 

I turn to stare out the window on the top floor

Jump now they say

Jump, just do it

It will be all over before you know it

To easy I think again...death

 

Shoved into the wall

Slapped over an over

Bleeding out

Screaming out

In pain

Laughing a maniacal laugh

 

I turn to death

To guide me through

A sight unseen

A love untouched

A spirit so bright

 

Death

Death is love

Love is pain

What a twisted fait

Why must we go through this unending game?

 

Self pain-

Suffocates,

Medicates,

What others have done

 

Breathing harder and harder

So fragile

Anything could happen

 

You see an opportunity arise in the nick of time

Relieve yourself

You deserve it

 

Staring at the blade

Shiny

Sharp

Just a little cut

Let your body feel what it desires

Let your body set off the chemical you’ve so longed for

A drug you make

To calm and please

It’s been so long

Addiction never tasted so sweet

 

You need this

You want this

What’s stopping you?

JUST DO IT!
They all scream at once

You fall to the floor

And curl up into a ball

You rock yourself

No, no I can’t do it

You repeat

 

The tears fall freely

The Images come

Faster

Harder

You lose your breath and feel faint

You scream out into the night

“Stop please stop!

Oh God please no more!”

 

The blade falls down beside you

Is this what you want?

Is this what you’ve fought for, for so long?

Do, it…

He’ll forgive you they say

He loves you they coo

He wouldn’t have made you like this if there were no purpose

Come on, it’s ok

Just one little slit

And we will go away

 

Picking up the blade

You see yourself

So dead inside

So lonely

 

Why did he make me this way?

Why has he not fought for me?

Why are the voices growing stronger?

Does he not want me anymore?

Am I not the child he meant to create?

 

Blood spills to the floor

You fall over and smile a wicked smile

The sweet relief

The pain goes away

The images fade

The voices are gone

And you have yourself to blame

 

You gave in

You did what they said

Your body loosens up

And your tears fall no longer

Death…too easy

Author's Note

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Reviews

[Looouise]

Wow.
That was amazing.
I liked the narrative of the poem.
:]
I don't know what else to say really.
But WOW.