i dont know who i am

i used to want to be that girl

the one with the piercings, the "strange" hair

i used to want to be that girl

the one that had a "different" style

the one that didnt look like everyone else

but then i realized

that wasnt who i am

i'm not that girl with the heavy eyeliner

colored hair, ripped black tshirts

i dont stand apart in style

my style is only black tshirts and 

jeans with vans and of course headphones

my style is hair down and annoying

i just admire those girls with the

piercings and heavy eyeliner

for not being afraid to express themselves

and me

just being different on the inside

within my mind and heart

and loving those who do that both ways

because i love those who are not afraid to 

be nonconformists and uniquely different

Author's Note

im so sad

Reviews

[Troy Henson]

I will agree with Jacob. It can be difficult being who we are. Acceptance does not come easy especially in today's society. Over time as life goes it's important to accept yourself for who you are. Eventually you will see that being you is easy and what anyone else may think is irrelevant.

[Ma'at]

Thank you xx

[Amber Lily]

I use to be one of those girls with cool hair and eyeliner, but now I'm much like you. Straight hair, and just black clothes. I don't even buy makeup anymore. I guess I decided that when people talk to me, they get the same taste of personality I use to physically show.
It's okay if you feel you look average, because it's the personality that counts. And as I have learned from you work that I have read, you are a great writer. So right there, is something you can identify yourself as. It's something you for sure know about you.
Whenever I find a read request from you I'm never disappointed with the work you put out. Your creative, artistic, and well defined. You may not know who you are, but you have shown me a part of you :)

[Ma'at]

Thank you, i really liked this :) xx

[Einstein Noodle]

i am sorry you are feeling sad :( teen years are difficult at best .. fit in ..don't fit in ... either choice can be honest or dishonest ... frustrating as that may be ... i hold to the age old admonition my parents chanted to me from time to time .. "Honesty is the best policy"
i have gone through the "who am i" part of life a long time ago ;) like jacob says below ... we get to points in our lives over which our skins become more and more comfortable ..(barring some negative emotional, psychological, or physical challenges) some people never like themselves ... it is a huge first step in loving others ... ok! enough pontification ;)
a very straight forward poem ... no frills so to speak ... you clearly express the conflict and somewhat of a resolution ... we are all intrinsically different and the same too .. how amazing right!?
with all the transgender news these days your poem could also be an expression of those particular struggles over self .. but your message is universal as well .. you got me going this morning Ma'at ..hope you are feeling more happy .. the sun is just starting to light the sky around here and the birds are starting peep ;)
E.

[Coyote Poetry]

I like the internal thoughts leading to the strong ending.
"because i love those who are not afraid to
be nonconformists and uniquely different"
Above lines should be all of goals and direction in life. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, sometimes it is difficult to let ourselves be who we really are...

we want to be accepted, but at the same time we closet ourselves because being the real "we" could be dangerous in the eyes of society...and we might totally be shunned...

as i got older i developed more of a "i don't care what others think, i am me, and will be that"

i found life much more comfortable.

really like the expression of this poem, and the accurate portrayal of the conflict within.

[Kelsey Schadt]

Your poem poses a common conflict--who we want to be versus who we are. I like how your poem shows the progression of self-understanding. It is nice to see that you have come to accept both who you are and those who represent who you wanted to be.