Drowning

A complicated mind
Not many like my mine
An empty vessel is what walks around
Staying above water any minute feel like just letting myself drown
Drown in this pain of sorrow and betrayal I feel
Drown in the sadness of loneliness and shame I feel
Drown in the constant pushing forward and going with the flow
Drown of the constant strain of just letting go
Drown in the anger and disappointment
Drown in the depression I try to fight
Drown in the anxiety that takes my night
Drown in the strength I portray to have
Drown in the weakness that I’ve become
Drown in the cowardliness I thought I won
Drown in the confidence that comes and goes
Drown in the love I want to show
Drown in the stings that pierce my soul
Drown in the responsibility thats at its peek
Drown in the love I try to seek
Drown in the weakness I thought I lacked
Drown in the strength that won’t come back
Under the water is where I am
Do I break the ice to breath again
Can’t catch my breath with every turn I take
Body wrestling against the tide
Arms not strong enough to beat the stride
Taking peeking breaths in and out
Mind seems strong but my souls in doubt
Hold my breath as long as I can
It seems like the tide is coming back in again