healing wounds

The angels that I hear

Worm my heart to heal

The scars disappear

From pain that I don’t feel

 

The wounds on my skin

Heal before my eyes

Tears were to thin

To see on the outside

 

For now I smile all day

With no depression inside me

No thoughts of being far way

These scars heal on me

 

Why did I push myself back?

It only sends me pain

It filled my heart with black

So I try to bring no pain

 

These days that doesn’t bring love

Filled my heart with hate

But a savor came from above

And gave me a life to take

Reviews

[Jordan's Back]

Epic this is a Well Flowed Well Emotioned Write. Excellent

[Janice Fronek(red.panda)]

thanks :D

[Writer *78*]

Impressive Work I can see that this piece has already been critqued so I wont go into things but nice all the same.

-Writer *78*

[Barbara Walker]

First stanza-did you mean "warn" not worm?
Second stanza-should be-"tears were too thin"
Last stanza-First line-grammatically correct is-"These days that don't bring love"
Last stanza-third line-grammatically correct is-"Fill my heart with hate"
Last stanza-third line-it's spelled "Savior"
Those corrections make all your "tenses" correct, as in present tense. If you wanted that stanza to reflect the past you would write it-
Those days that didn't bring love,
filled my heart with hate,
but a Savior came from above
and gave me a life to take.

It probably seems like I am nit picking, but spelling and grammar errors can detract from a great poem. You want your reader to only notice the message you are sending and the beautiful words you use to convey it.

[Sir Jaykom]

This is very good and well written. Love the rhyme system that you used. Definitely a good read.

[Janice Fronek(red.panda)]

thank you so much

[beautiful dreamer]

so pretty angel. you always write pretty and meaningful poems. i love it :)

Love always,

Beautiful (that took five tries to spell..fail)

[Janice Fronek(red.panda)]

thank you beautiful

[beautiful dreamer]

your welcome angel :)

[Chesney W.]

This is beautiful... very unique ... I love this..keep up the good work!
-Chesney Chey(:

[Janice Fronek(red.panda)]

thank you ^^ I just wrote it in 10 minutes It just camed to me just like that :D

[Chesney W.]

haha,,,awesome! that's how most of my poetry is...lol

[Janice Fronek(red.panda)]

lol sweet :D

[Chesney W.]

yupp!