nobody really knows

everybody says they know me.

yet

i have to make up for it by putting up another wall around my heart becouse by the time i realize they're making s**t up. i get hurt again.

i already have 5 tons of brick put around my heart blocking it off from people around me.

becouse they start S**T and want to piss me off.

i get tired of it and i brake down and cry.

 

Reviews

[William Usry]

I always love it when writers can convey emotion with just a few words...the short, simple nature of this poem accentuates the message and makes it very clear to the reader.

My only suggestions are that you work on the structuring a bit. I am drawn to non conventional poetry too but I think the reader would find it easier to follow along if you provided some syllabic rhythm. I'd also love to see some of the phrasing tuned a bit. Instead of "they want to start s**t and piss me off" how about something that paints a picture for the reader.

Overall i really enjoyed this poem though...I think we all build brick walls up around our hearts and you portrayed that really well here. Great job.

[17thWhitePrince]

WoW !!!
Such Sorrow & Pain !!!

"i already have 5 tons of brick put around my heart blocking it off from people around me."

How Aweful It Must Be !!!

[Song of Mercy]

This one got me Cherri, I used to metaphorically think I had bricks around myself. I remember when I was around 22 and they started coming down. It hurt, and yes I cried. Again, you have captured the essence of life in this piece. Great read, great poem. Thank you for sharing. Barb