Deliverance

A true poem about dreams that I have that never happened

Deliverance

 

I remember things,

Images and dreams

That I’m sure I’ve never lived before

 

Of Peacock wings-

And Gossamer seams

Crystal waves lapping a sandy shore

 

Snow-capped mountains,

Or Exotic trees

And a warm, forgiving island breeze

 

Onyx fountains

Haunt my memories,

Though I have never experienced these!

 

Metallic fish

In a turquoise lake

Under silvery jungle moonlight

 

Oh! I wish,

Tremble and quake!

In the wake of the memory’s sight!

 

So alive...

Real, it must be,

Or some vision from a past life

 

I strive,

In an urban city

To visit these places amongst the angst and the strife

 

Take me away!

Far away from here

To the places where my visions exist

 

Instead of the death of today,

Grey and unclear

In this city’s polluted and toxic mist

 

Deliver me

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Carole]

Dreams are so real and sometimes send a message. I believe in God's ability to speak to us in dreams and have been to a class on interpreting dreams. (Not enough to have figured it out), but I have had some very vivid dreams like this one.

Your poem flows "like a dream." It really does! I love your use of words and the vivaciousness of this piece through the imagery you chose.

So glad I read this today, Emily!

Blessings, Carole

[Liam]

The imagery is absolutely amazing. This rivals Claude McKay!
Wow, well done!

[JohnL]

This is imaginative work - - or is it? Perhaps in the past, you really have seen some of these wondrous sights and scenes. Who knows? Was there ever a reality as beautiful as the one you describe? One thing of which I am confident - you do them justice and allow your readers to join you in some wonderful places. You have an eye for a picture and a voice to describe.
I am most interested in the form you use. A three line free verse triplet - or is it? - There is a middle line rhyme between pairs of three. You sneaked that in very cleverly - I nearly missed it, yet it is vital to the piece. The lines are short - but the flow is smooth. The form suits the spirit of the work. I like it!

[None]

Visions keep us going, our minds are too active to settle for the status quo. Your thoughts are beautiful and lead the reader away from their own problems to magical thoughts. Great writing!

[Lily1111]

Maybe they are glimpses of what will come to be! Wouldn't that be wonderful. I really liked the feel of this poem as it drew me in. It had the quality of a lovely, vivid dream. The flow was awesome and carried me along like I was floating on a raft down a lazy creek. I loved the rhyme and I thought it was so creatively woven. I especially liked the lines:

"Metallic fish
In a turquoise lake
Under silvery jungle moonlight"

Beyond the beauty of language and imagery, well, it just sounds so cool! Promise when you go you will take me with you.

Great poem. Truly enjoyed.

[Sarah]

This was a gorgeous poem, the description was BEAUTIFUL. =o Made me wish that I could have memories of this place! I really loved the fifth stanza, your use of color was breath-taking. Great job & I hope you can find the mysterious place one day! (: