history

don't pay too much attention to the details, it is a trickster muse

I carry my remorse

in bulging pockets

long years have done little

 

to diminish the weight

of imagined sins

 

I shine a little light

 

I smile a little song

 

as if to ward off

 

the reproach

that I see

in your eyes.

 

There are so many

 

penalties

 

for loving

 

 

Reviews

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlande..]

I only need one ear plug to hear the coins of the mercenary in my worn thin pocket...we didn't do battle requiring me to win; I just waited til we both got (super) drunk and I combined our "consciousness" and ran his (slightly less) worn down pocket(s). I'm just trying to pick up the slack on the weight of being a trickster..it's sadly, quite ironic and zen and, sigh...

well; well done...I ignored a couple details as per your request, but well done, nonetheless. (:

[p.kuhl]

Wow, I really love this poem. Powerful images with the pockets.. on top of that, the message is very close to home for me. Thank you for sharing.

[Alessander]

There are so many

penalties

for loving


I really love these lines. It pretty much summarizes all of Shakespeare's plays.
The bigger question is, why do we play a game which routinely injures us? I hear Darwin grumbling, gotta go!

[Emily B]

that is quite a compliment, thank you :)

[Trigorin]

Not bad. This is still a little staccato and disjointed for my taste but even so this is quite obviously well-written, and you use some very good imagery here. Good work.

[Emily Feret]

I enjoyed this so much!

[Emily B]

thank you

[TL Boehm]

holy cow. When we don't believe we meet the expectations of others...that's what the poem shouts to me - and as always I am amazed by how deep the words go - even though they are simply stated. You never waste a word.

[Leslie Philibert]

I love the fragile, breakable, song-like middle part that exactly reflects the contradiction of the sense of the last lines, the reproach in eyes, the penalty. So as Emily does so well, a poem about how hard it is in a partnership. Excellent.

[E.H. Monroe]

Carrying remosre is bulging pockets. S**t right. We never quite empty, just keep putting it away and stacking and the load never gets lighter.
This read to me as the denying that anything is wrong. Let's walk and smile like the world is sunny and perfect and just keep stacking away skeletons for closets until the graveyard overfills.

Nice work indeed

[OT]

ahh I think this is my favourite of all your poems!! it's deceptively simple, hidden behind the words is strong meaning and it does make you wonder, I think we all carry around sins in our pockets!! and there are many penalties! really liked this one!!!