scribbles

scribbles

A Poem by Emily B
"

another loose one

"

I thought of you today.


I took all the things I wanted you to know
scribbled them on a card
and tied them to the tail of a red balloon.

Hopeful--let it loose to the wind--
knowing you will not get the words
in my time -
or your time.

And if the worn and weathered
ink has faded
beyond what you can read--
hold it close.
You will know
my heart -  without the scrawl.

In the meantime, be well.


I love you.

 

© 2011 Emily B


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Featured Review

This is a beautiful poem, a favorite.
I like the way you structured it but have one minor suggestion.

I think if you put a line break after the first line, and break before the last line, the architecture of the poem would complement the soft drama of your soulful words even more. This would also provoke a peripheral reading thus(ly?):


I thought of you today.

(body
of
poem)

I love you.


do you see how the eye would naturally play with that?

Your best poems are so heartfelt, and your layout of the words so creative that I hesitate to say anything. Then I think "but isn't that what we're here for?" Therefore, my humble opinion, fwiw. This poem is beautifully written; you have a gift for sentiment- sweet yet never cloying.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Oh this hits close to home. You have actually drawn a tear... At my fathers funeral we did this. Wrote messages and sent them flying on blue balloons. Amazing write. Thanks so much for sharing this one.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

i like the freedom given to your love, whether the person ever reads the balloon
or not..and the sense of faith in devotion. excellent.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

You will know
my heart without the scrawl...
Emily, this was beautiful. I enjoyed each line.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I think of things like ...Why a "red " balloon ? Then I remember the heart and blood and I remember how love courses through us..throughout our pain when it needs to walk away...fly away in slow and weathered degeneration of the very passion within us..our words..our thoughts.
Then the poem was also put into red ink..into the very source ...and I am forced by heart to think again.
I think of time, healing and hope..I think of the beauty in gestures and I become inspired... again. Thanks~

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

i don't think i can explain how much i love this. i'm so jealous that i didn't write this one myself. simply perfect.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Even if the balloon got away, the poetry didn't. Hearts can be such tricky things.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

this gave me an idea/inspiration..remember that funny/random thought I had a couple days ago?
It ties in w/ that. No pun intended...
And for those that might judge this as "not a proper review"..first of all look at my name.
That said, I think that a reference to the obscure actualization of a thought and a concept being inspired by your work is a fine compliment/acknowledgment of your writing.
But I will say also that--
"You will know my heart without the scrawl" is a beautifully expressed way to wind down this wonderful piece of writing. [=

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A touching write.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

It's a great way to let one know... the unspeakable. I liked this one a lot!!

Posted 14 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Such a touching picture... the longing of the heart to communicate with a loved one, the impossibility of it all, the hope that one day those thoughts might find a home...that heart might pour its sweetness on the object of our desire... You have such a beautiful mind, Emily

Posted 14 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


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653 Views
34 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 4 Libraries
Added on December 15, 2009
Last Updated on December 5, 2011

Author

Emily B
Emily B

Richmond, KY



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