about things not named

and miles to go before I sleep

I never write about fear.

I don't describe

those emotions that spilled over

into adulthood.

The panic that was deeper

than the darkness.

There were never enough

flashlights or nightlights or porchlights

to ease my fears.

Eventually I started leaving

all the lights on

all over the house

all night long.

I still couldn't explain

the root of the fear

for which I didn't have a name.

It's almost funny

how quickly fear evaporated

once I had a word

for all those things felt

but never seen.

I've heard there is power

in a word.

I guess that's true.

 

Reviews

[emmajoy]

When small and petrified of thunder, our daddy, who would lie to his children, would wink then say, 'Chick, I've heard that thunder's the naughty angels slamming Heaven's' gates.' As I grew up I realised that there's postcard read for everything. We have to find Truth or create a comforting Excuse. Can still remember what falling/slipping was like when trying to copy my older siblings - was so darned crazy, left me with a height fear for ages. Still gasp when i look after an edge into near nothingness BUT... that gasp gives that precious second to know i can't fly, don't want to fly, want to stay safe. And that's what matters, staying literally grounded, physically and mentally - somehow. Perhaps my word is 'safe'

As they always have been, your words are subtly and beautifully laid, Emily. Phrase by phrase you've said your say, and gradually, logically and beautifully found your own truth.. And you know, you've guessed right, it is TRUE. There's always power in a word; it's the search for the right one that takes time. 'Power' is a truth, isn't it?!.

[Tony]

When we are young, there are so many things that we fear, but I don't think we dwell on them, we are too busy and other things take up our good thoughts...those fears are put away into the back of our mind and may not surface for many years, if at all. Some fears are so bad, we repress them, until one day in our later years, something may trigger that memory or that fear, or we may be questioning ourselves and how we became the person that we are...that is when that memory comes back of those fears and then through deeper analysis, because now we have much more time to dwell on things, felt but not seen...A word appears.
Hold tight that boy of yours, you will give him that light he needs.

Tony

[Jibey]

Our hearts often feel fears about that which we canot fully grasp... Do we ever banish those fears? Maybe we just shelve them when we feel the soft oblivion of love's sweet assurance...

[Touché Armada]

Do you know what I have always found funny? Not every house is like that, nor is every outdoor area, only some. It's just some other jerks darkness lingering thats all =)

[LJW]

For me, the more honest the better.

We all have these unnamed things. I believe even if you name this feeling for your son, he will still have his own unnamed thing (s).

I could not look out my darkened bedroom window at night. It was on the 2nd floor and I had no real idea what could possibly be out there, but I just could not look.

[Ellen Hammond]

Too honest??? I think we all have or have had certain fears that lingered from childhood. Personally, I think we never quite outgrow them. Years ago I identified where my fear of the dark stemmed from and was able to overcome it. But it remained in my subconscience, and since the collision 2 years ago, it has surfaced to the point that I can not relax and sleep when it is dark. It is even worse now that I'm going through the flashbacks, because I can't even lie down without feeling like the darkness is suffocating me. That fear and being claustrophobic may be irrational but they are still very real. Even trying to calm myself by reasoning does not stop my heart from pounding, etc.

This is a very thought provoking write. So glad you shared it with us.

[Ed Hart]

one night in my mid 50s when I was alone in our large house I decided to watch the first two Alien films...I gots to tell you, this old gangster went to sleep that night with every light in the house up bright....

[Anthony M Smith Jr]

I really love this poem. Too honest to have fears? I think not! I told that to my youngest son not long ago when we heard a wolf howl so close to our home, that I use to be afraid of noises in the night. Thanks for your words and sharing your honesty!
TT-TTO-NI-K
Elk

[Creepy Swine Guy]

The fear, though, is of those things that lurk in the dark. And no matter how much light you spread, somewhere just beyond the light, those things still lurk; watching us ... waiting for us to lower our guard.

[Raef C. Boylan]

Tut tut, what is this "too" honest? No such thing, surely?

I liked this bit:
"There were never enough
flashlights or nightlights or porchlights
to ease the fright." - resonates with fear [lions and tigers and bears oh my haha]

The trouble with us folk who encourage our imaginations is...sometimes it gets out of hand :-/
I'm a big wuss.

Speaking of "too" honest, I liked this but it didn't quite hit me as your highest standard of poetry; good writing, yes, concise and explorative but...I dunno. Could be just me. Any imagery lurking in the shadows?

I think it is just me, having re-read. It flows fine and is a pleasant read.
Thanks for sharing, and good luck with your son.