out to sea

almost nothing

on nights when I lie awake and staring

eyes wide as some gold-eyed hoot owl

locked away from the words I ought to have

I find my muse is out to sea

lost in the ebb and tide of things

 

Reviews

[theludus]

Ugh, I like those first two lines, and the thought of this poem, very much.

on nights when I lie awake and staring

this is your killer line, but whether intended or not, it introduces a metrical sound that I long to continue.

eyes wide as some gold-eyed hoot owl

Similarly this line is a fine one, the phrasing is golden.

locked away from the words I ought to have

I find my muse is out to sea

in the ebb and tide of things

I'm biased I guess, because I do love metrical poetry, but perhaps it's also that these last three lines hunt in the right ground, but are less colorful or wistful than they might be.

Sound is a very very important aspect of poetry, it often guides me to phrases as well as intuition might, and I think if you listen to your ear it is as good a lead as any. the key thing is that one word often informs another:

on nights when I lie awake and staring,

eyes wide as the gold-eyed hoot owl, bearing

down on thoughts that ought to be mine

I find my muse is out to sea

awash in the absent, ebbing tide

............................

or not. Food for thought at least.

[Eric]

Though brief, Out to Sea is the breath of bees, quick and honey-sweet.

"...gold-eyed hoot owl..." Nice.

Ebreezy

[Xyve rrg]

it's a beautiful materialization of the occasion of musings and mulls... what a lovely write! ^_^

[deeps]

A beautiful write here
I like this

[jOHN]

this is beautiful and impressive!

[alma7]

Had to read this many times, really like it. This line stand out for me "locked away from the words I ought to have". You are able to say so much in such a little poem.

[An Ordinary Woman]

It's perfect! How many nights must we spend wishing for words that don't come? But your sure came this time. It is lovely, Emily.

[Raef C. Boylan]

Does your muse take a beautiful pea-green boat, or have I been misled by the picture? Tsk tsk.

"some gold-eyed hoot owl" - liked your phrasing of this.

Really liked this poem as a whole; it's way more than 'nothing'. It feels complete, it works as a reflection in total, many of us can relate, the language is spot on...how dare you insult this work?!? :-D

[raining]

hi, sometimes it is like that, isnt it. a poem about writing a poem. very good. and yes? we would miss you if you were gone far away. your poetry is filled with color and subtle light. bye raining

[Jonhoi Vaughn]

These words are cogent. I too long for a cure for "writers' block". I sail on a raft and look up into the sky with this poem. Makes me want to put up an easel and splash paint everywhere ^_^

[Lizanne]

I love this. I offer only my inadequte interpretation of this writing. "Locked away from words I ought to have",a temporary brain burp. "I find my muse is out to sea", your goddess of poetry has taken a brief sojurn, leaving you without inspiration. If I am right, when you see her ask if she saw mine and send me her location. I truly admire your artistic visuals in the piece of word art.