that darned muse

I saw you in the moon last night
something in the glow around it
spoke to me of your light
of your spirit

I thought I heard laughter
up there among the stars
my spirit floated upward
on the notes of a song

higher than I could reach
with my hands. It must have been
the altitude that made me think
I could feel you smiling.

Reviews

[Dezaraye]

The last few nights, the moon has been so incredible. It rises above the mountains around the time I go to bed, and so when I lay down, I look above me out my window and there's the moon shining down. Sometimes, I'm reminded of people that I love and other times, it's just me and the moon ... and the moon is wrapping me in her beams and loving me.

[Jibey]

You are a true romantic... I saw you there too

[J]

Who is this for and why is it untitled? Untitled poems, to me, give me the assumption that it's not quite finished, not quite there perhaps... am I right? I'm going to go flat-out and suggest something in your first four lines: to cut out the second and third lines as unnecessary chaff and connect the first and fourth somehow, perhaps:

I saw you in the moon last night
and it spoke to me of your light--of your spirit.

What do you think? More condensed? Just a thought I'd throw out, yeah?

Like Maddy Hatter has already said, this spoke to me of someone dearly departed, someone who you still remember with warmth. I've felt this too and seen it: their smiles, their presence, when I wasn't expecting it, yes. It's a strange feeling, but comforting.

The perfect title for this would be the person you're speaking of...

[Solst Rapture]

This is an unpolished gem Emily. I still think these hyphens are detracting from the poetry. Consider removing them. What about trying different structures too?

I saw you in the moon last night
something in the glow around it
spoke to me of your light
of your spirit

I thought I heard laughter
up there among the stars
my spirit floated upward
on the notes of a song

higher than I could reach
with my hands. It must have been
the altitude that made me think
I could feel you smiling.

Just ideas...friend!

[Philosophile. (Maddy)]

This was beautiful! I loved the imagery. My interpretation of it was that the individual you're talking about has passed on, though my interpretation might be wrong. I loved how vivid this is. I could see the moon along with you.

[luke312]

Righteous Poem

[Collect-Eye]

that may have been me maniacally laughing as I lost my mind last night.

[Angelic Darkness]

This is beautifully spiritual. You grasp the elements of our senses,
and we become free, like a simple breeze, yet we feel it strongly
within. AD

[Gandré]

sweetness, always, when I read you Emily. Striving for touch his thoughts through your unspoken words, I am sure, he knows. Hope all is well with the girls and you enjoy a nice autumn, like we have it here. It is my favorite season. XOXO.

[*** Hey Jude***]

Such a touching piece to share about the one you love.
I believe without a doubt that when you have a real connection with someone;
you can sense them and their emotions like no other can! ~ Jude :-)