Stitches

For the Lotus-Eaters CHallenge.

Because you never sleep when I’m gone

I decided to make you a quilt—

to fill the void where I should be

 

I chose sunshine for windowpane blocks

but couldn’t get the squares cut out just right

Stray beams spilled over with every snip

 

Sashings should be complimentary

I chose laughter

It’s a little loud for your taste

but should sing a sweet lullaby

 

Reluctant to choose a contrast

I selected just a little of sadness and grief

It takes very little of the dark

to balance out the whole

 

I started a border of memories

but didn’t have enough stored up

to go all the way around

 

I suppose that my gift to you

will remain a work in progress.

 

Reviews

[TL Boehm]

I think my favorite lines are:
I chose sunshine for windowpane blocks

but couldn't get the squares cut out just right.

Stray beams spilled over with every snip.

but the whole poem is finely woven....each word lovingly stitched until the whole piece warms the soul.
GOD what a GOOD POEM! (sorry - I couldn't help myself) No wonder you're on poetrydances.com for May. I've been meaning to congratulate you for DAYS.

A year here. I'm takin' credit for that - you know that, right?
You're one of the reasons I haven't crawled out of the cafe into the cyber sewer like the ground dwelling cockroach I am....

[mick weller]

a lifetime's work...
a woman's care and attention to detail is felt here...
(by a clumsy oaf of a man...)
why do I feel sadness because there aren't enough memories for a border...
I feel a dwelling on the past in this piece... almost a haunting
to me this comes across as a sad write
is this a touch of bitterness?` It's a little loud for your taste`..
I wonder... hmm, a very thought-provoking piece
thank you for this

[Stephen Ownby]

This is good. Very nice imagery and subtle metaphor. Laughter and sunlight are used as descriptors for the relationship without being trite or over-the-top. The last couple stanzas before the end are a little bit cliche and blatant. Could you find a way to say the same things with imagery? I like the idea of darkness "weighing" more than light. The ending is very strong. I enjoyed reading this.

[Dezaraye]

I love this piece, Emily. It's absolutely amazing! The imagery is beautiful and I love the metaphor. It's absolutely perfect.

[emz]

WOW... What an outstanding poem... what a lovely thought to make a quilt out of every day emotions and elements... I love the fact there is not enough memories yet and that it remains a work in progress, such a beautiful way of words... i absolutely thank-you for that x

[Kara Emily Krantz]

darling!!!! i haven't read you in a long while, and i can see that you have just grown and grown. this is absolutely delightful. that first verse is just lovely, completely caught me. and you carry the metaphor/quilt right through to the piece so welllll

"Because you never sleep when I'm gone
I decided to make you a quilt-
to fill the void where I should be"

I mean my gosh, that is beautiful :)


"I chose sunshine for windowpane blocks
but couldn't get the squares cut out just right
Stray beams spilled over with every snip"

what wonderful imagery here.


"Sashings should be complimentary
I chose laughter"

:) yes
i also liked the use of the word lullaby - it fit so well with the piece

"Reluctant to choose a contrast"
for soem reason i was really impressed with this line - the use of contrast... was just such a wonderful decision. :)


"I started a border of memories
but didn't have enough stored up...

a work in progress."

that is fantastic - my second read through it made me appreciate it even more. that the memories are not enough to complete the quilt - so you will have to build more memories together. awww, just delicious.

fantastic job, my dear! :)
sorry i've been away for so long :)

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

What a wonderful concept to construct a quilt made of sunshine, laughter and memories. You paint these words as an artist recognizing there must be some dark along with the brightness to make it visually effective. Just a stunning write. Thank you.
Light,
Siddartha

[Alice]

This is beautifully, cleverly, touchingly, outstandingly GOOD. Stray beams do indeed spill over the whole way through, all heartwarming and starry, with a lovely touch of melancholy. It's just right in every way.

[Irin Chendale]

This is beautfully written. I love how you didn't stick with "normal" materials in a quilt and instead used sunshine, laughter, longing and grief, and memories. It definitely put a creativie spin to the quilt making process. I can think of a few quilters in my family that would appreciate this even more than I do.

[J]

I've never been able to sew two piece of fabric together properly... the stitching always comes apart after several wears. I guess I only sew words. You do both here wonderfully.

Great extended metaphor.

[robin]

sort of the inversion of personification, a really great idea. The metaphoric materialization of moods/functions still brings these qualities to "life" ironically even as she weaves them into her quilt in progress. Dynamic fun!