Don't

Don't

A Poem by Emily B

Don't ask me if I slept well.

You most certainly know that there

was no sleep for me last night.

Lying in the dark

Waiting for a touch that

wouldn't come.

If a caress could cross miles

If by thinking of holding me--

I thought I saw a shadow move but

Found that I could not Will you to me.

Don't laugh.

Bothered as I was

I gradually fell

Into a fitful kind of release--

Set loose from a body that longed for your touch.

"I slept fine."

"And you?"

© 2009 Emily B


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Featured Review

I am always rendered speechless at your efficient use of words! I most certainly felt like I was a part of this poem and I was the antagonist! It just has that effect of drawing me into that role. Well done! The evolutionary process of the persona was not only subtle. It was necessary. I long for words like these to sleep peacefully on my pages ^_^

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I've never read a poem like this before. It's unique.

I like how the first line and last line correlate, almost as if they could be what is said, and the rest of the poem is between the lines. I like it.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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O!
he he he

Ive been told i have to learn to be this way....i just dont know if i can do that!!.....made me grin!....so very 'cool' in the end.....haha....i actually heard the tone of voice and saw the face and body language...hehe

x,
O!


Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

haha...
its amazing how you manage to capture how people answer one way in their mind, and another out loud
the "real" and "polite" version

the ending
"I slept fine."
"And you?"
comes across as slightly rebelious (if that is the word...though its not the right word to use i think),
as if the person didnt want to admit the longing to the other person

and also like a dare, "And you?"
as, and you? did you want me as much as i want you...
did you think of me as well, when i was thinking of you...
and so on, so much in that "And you?"

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very well written... I enjoyed the images as the mind plays tricks on the heart as the longing grows, I loved the dream like state this poem possessed.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Fantastic journey. I felt I was part of your dream that wasn't there. It almost sounds like you're describing intimate strangers, people who share a bed but not their souls.


Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

You are just one of my very favorite poets here. Everytime I think that I've found my favorite of your works, you write a new favorite. This was an amazing picture of longing accross the miles. Not JUST a lustful longing, but a longing rooted in so much more.

My new favorite of your works and going into my favorites.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

That's awesome. It's something that a lot of people would like to say to one another.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

love the ending... it's amazing how our heart can be pounding, crying out from within and yet somehow our body and mind pushes thru the pain and we carry on without anyone really knowing the struggle that ensues... Well written Emily

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Ohh, Emily, this one is a painful one. I know those nights too ... but I sleep alone every night now.
Very poignant and heartfelt writing. Maybe it is time for one of those walks in the meadow again, Spring is right around the corner and maybe this time, he will go with you.

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

All of the words gone unsaid could construct whole worlds of there own. To be a poet in every grace of the step, and to walk the words you've penned is to live whole memories over again. Prose worth reading twice over, if not three.

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


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1166 Views
23 Reviews
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Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on February 5, 2008
Last Updated on August 20, 2009


Author

Emily B
Emily B

Richmond, KY



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