my Valentine

That day is coming; that one I’ve always dreaded. It was cute at first. Flowers and chocolate and lacy froo-froo cards found their way into my hands from boys with sweet intentions. Boys grew into men and still there were flowers and cards. Once there was a live rose from a man who didn’t believe in cut flowers. It was always a day to look forward to, like a birthday or Christmas. Once upon a time, it was a day to feel special.

 

I don’t remember when the charm of the day died. It may be that it drizzled away slowly, just another one of the pitfalls of being an adult. Work and time and money all conspired against the day of hearts and flowers. Gestures still passed between us; a box of candy or a card.

 

I want the make-a-tissue-paper-covered-shoebox for school kind of excitement back. Maybe I’ll make my own card this year. I’ll get some of those jumbo Crayolas, the kind that fit in your hand really well. I’ll need some construction paper: pink, red and white and maybe even purple. Of course, that means I need school scissors and white glue and paper doilies. If you’re going to do a thing, you’d best do it right.

 

I’ll draw hearts and clouds and arrows. I’ll take my time and use a ruler to measure it all out if I need to. And with bright colored crayons and lots of patience, maybe I’ll even stay inside the lines. I’ll write a pretty verse all my own. No leaving my fate in the hands of Hallmark this year. No way.

 

And the more I think of it, I have to wonder. It could well be that the problem with Valentine’s day all along, was in my own heart.

 

Reviews

[The Girl That Let You G..]

I think you got it perfectly at the end...Its so much more meaningful being homemade with all your heart put into it, rather then some cheesy card from hallmark or clintons, with silly pictures and verses that everyone sees...
Wonderful story Emily :)

[therisa]

That your heart is pure and full of love, which those commercial productions are, a pale copy of. Please never give that up.

[Emily B]

i'm getting back to it :)

[therisa]

Healing can take a long time. Please be paitence with yourself.

[Emily B]

it's took 39 plus years to get to this place, it will happen as it does

[therisa]

I understand and good for you.

[...]

. this is beautiful ...
. i wish more people celebrated this magical innocence ...
. i wish they didn't tarnish it with random behaviour ...

[Phibby Venable]

i miss making valentines. this is so lovely, emily - it has the true spirit
of valentine's day.

[Greg Skura]

This is so sweet Emily!

[Jibey]

I want to send you your heart for Valentines Day... There is no better heart I can find... I will kiss it first - a thousand times

[Tony]

I like the reminiscing of the story and how it leads to reflecting thoughts.
"If you are going to do a thing, you'd best do it right." this line ties in with the last two lines...in my opinion.
I hope you have found your heart.
Have a happy Valentines Day Sweet Emily.

[Nothing Personal]

A nice extended poem..That's what it seems to me:-) A superb ending..to all your wonder what went wrong over the years and what was right in fact, earlier..

[abhas]

this is something ... expressed so simply... and the way i like it... really the last line sums it all up... but as always we'll always be the way we are... at the fate of our hearts... :)