A New Day

A New Day

A Poem by Em-star

I walk along the cool sand

hearing the waves crash,

The birds cherping

the trees rusiling,

as i lie down to take a nap.

The water touching me on the toes

 as the sun wakes up to rise,

its a new day but unfortunately,

i have to say good-bye.

© 2011 Em-star


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tHe
I like this one. The words overpower the grammer errors

Posted 13 Years Ago


First of all I would like to say welcome to Writers Cafe! Now for your poem. I liked the image that the poem gave me. It was nice, yet bittersweet towards the end. There were a few grammer and spelling issues, but those can be easily fixed.

In the third line, 'cherping' should be 'chirping'.
In the fourth line, 'rusiling' should be 'rustling'.
In the fifth line, 'i' should be 'I'
In the ninth line, again 'i' should be 'I'

Other than the little grammer problems, I really enjoyed reading this poem. Good job!
~Aurora

Posted 13 Years Ago



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167 Views
2 Reviews
Added on May 2, 2011
Last Updated on May 2, 2011

Author

Em-star
Em-star

Albury, Albury, Australia



About
I'm very sporty and love singing/guitar. i LOVE writing!!!! more..

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