The Preacher Gets His Walking Papers

He didn't play the game they wanted.

The Preacher Gets His Walking Papers

 

By Elton Camp

 

The deacons called in the preacher “for a chat”

And uncomfortably talked about this and that

Eventually, the oldest of the deacons spoke out

“Preacher, I’ll tell you what this is really about.”

 

“Your sermons are so boring they put us to sleep.

You try to explain things that are way too deep.

When really all that we would like you to say

Is that to heaven we’ll eventually be on our way.”

 

“You seem to have the idea it’s not okay to sin,

But we know that Jesus is our savior and friend.

To come to church Sunday should be good enough

For us to do right every day is just a lot too tough.”

 

“Drinking, cussing, lying, gambling and fornicating

All these things it seems to us that you are hating.

But we think things like that should be up to us

And we don’t need any lecture from an ornery cuss.”

 

“Besides, my nephew from the Lord has got a call

To come to this church and minister to one and all.

And since he is a man of the modern time and day,

We think we will like much better what he has to say.”

 

“We feel sure you will find some other place to preach

Where there are sinners and hypocrites you can reach.

We will pay you the wages that you are now due,

Starting today, working in our church you’re through.”