A Collection of Oxymorons

Let me know if your favorite is missing.

A Collection of Oxymorons

 

By Elton Camp

 

When contradictory terms appear side-by-side,

We recognize that an oxymoron the writer tried

 

An “Open secret” really can’t be

“Larger half” is an impossibility

 

“Act naturally” just has to be fake

“Deafening silence” sense can’t make

 

“Microsoft Works” is just a big joke

But Apple users won’t have to choke

 

“Jumbo shrimp” would be something to see

“Pretty ugly” seems highly unlikely to me

 

“Exact estimate” contradict each other

To defend “rolling stop” I had druther

 

“Only choice” means one thing to do

So how can “choice” then be true?

 

Think about meaning of a “fine mess”

That’s it’s contradictory you will confess

 

So two things have “about equal” worth?

It’d be like a “just war” here on the earth

 

“One of the only” we hear all of the time

“Accurate horoscope” so says a ball of slime

 

A “bankrupt millionaire” can’t really exist

A “calm storm” would be too easily missed

 

If your favorite oxymoron doesn’t appear,

Please send me an e-mail and let me hear