Do You Mind If I Smoke?

Do you really need to ask?

Do You Mind If I Smoke?

 

By Elton Camp

 

Yes indeed, I definitely do mind if you smoke

Why wouldn’t I mind being made to choke?

From smoke normal humans quickly will flee

Do you really think I want it blown all over me?

 

Authorities have often enough issued the alarm

Second-hand smoke the innocent come to harm

Even my clothes your smoke will penetrate

And impart a stench that I thoroughly hate

 

I doubt very much that in seriousness you ask

Unless you’re prepared to offer an oxygen mask

You hope to hear, “Oh, no, I don’t mind at all.”

So you ask the obvious�"oh what colossal gall

 

To pollute others, some smokers will claim the right

Only one way should we tolerate such vicious blight

Smokers “rights” the innocent might come to hail

When these irresponsible folk manage not to exhale

 

Truly, responsibility and common sense we do lack

And cigarettes should be taxed ten bucks per pack

That good day, for me, can’t come at all too soon

Meanwhile, please do your smoking on the moon