Drunk as a Dog

What a comparison.

Drunk as a Dog

 

By Elton Camp

 

Some similes don’t make much sense at all

Like the intoxicated, “drunk as a dog” to call

“Drunk as a skunk” is also heard all the time

But I figure that is because of the nice rhyme

 

A dog I’ve never once seen shop a whiskey store

Likewise, one has never entered a saloon before

Anyone ever seen a dog with a six-pack of beer?

We sure don’t have anything like that around here

 

Our old hound dogs all seem to get along just fine

Without a slug of whiskey or even a sip of wine

The dogs might well say it’s unfair to compare

Them to the swaggering bipeds with so little hair

 

But it might be well to keep old Brutus on a chain

So that “sober as a judge,” your dog does remain

It isn’t likely that he’d be accepted at the local AA

And I never have heard of any groups called DDA