the placing of the performance of love

I want to become the humblest of your servants

State your business! I love you

How long until our resurrection?

 

Dear friend, eye-witness to my pain?

I submit my vulnerability as evidence

Of my longing for oneness with you

 

What is majestic evidence

If not to become beloved

To share intimacy, both fair and true

 

Until the heart is like grain

Until the hours are like wheat

Pressed in the granary of our belonging

 

I want to become the humblest of your thoughts

As a stone that says: I know you

As the water which replies: of course.  

Reviews

[Kristallo]

This is a gorgeous testimony to your love. So exquisite and refined. I wanted to pinpoint a certain line, but I found I could not pick any one that I liked more than the line preceding it. In its finesse, all of this piece is wonderous in its entirety. I would not change one subtlety, You have so finely captured the depth of emotion with your artistic eye and passionate pen. Your thoughts are enigmatic, and I follow each thought and scene with an air of grace in my lungs and awe in my heart. Great job would be an understatement. You keep writing, and i'll keep humbling myself within the presence of your fine words. Thank you for sharing.

[Eloha]

Better to have 2 fine reviews than a score of one lined praise. I do appreciate the artistry of your reviews. I like enigmatic and lines with finesse

[YYH]

Purity without any materialism considerations, without pride or possessing, but only the tenderness and understanding between vulnerable souls. My understanding. I like the last stanza.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Wow...incredible. I love the last stanza, it is so poignant and beautifully penned. I honestly can't think of anything to pick apart on this one. Very beautifully done!

[Eloha]

the repeat of 'evidence' may sound clumsy, but I like purposeful clumsiness.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

I had not a thing to say about the repetition, I use it a lot myself