Shattered Reflections

This poem captures the deep regret, the desire for redemption, and the complexities of a mother's love intertwined with the consequences of her choices.

Shattered Reflections

In the mirror, a stranger’s face,
Once filled with dreams, now lost in grace.
She traded laughter for a bottle’s lie,
As time slipped by, she watched love die.

A mother’s heart, once strong and bright,
Now dulled by shadows, fading light.
She gave up children, one by one,
For fleeting joy, for battles won.

Her son lay sick, a heavy toll,
While she drowned sorrows, losing control.
The money spent on whiskey’s kiss,
Left him alone, a life amiss.

Cancer’s grip, a cruel reminder,
Of all she lost, of dreams left behind her.
She fought the beast that claimed her flesh,
Yet longed for love, to heal the mess.

But one daughter turned, her heart turned cold,
She held her mother accountable, truth be told.
“You chose the bottle, you chose the night,
While we were crying, you lost the fight.”

In quiet moments, she weeps alone,
For the family she shattered, the love overthrown.
She wants to fix what’s torn apart,
To mend the bonds, to heal her heart.

With every breath, she battles shame,
Wishing for solace, to take back the blame.
But broken trust, like glass, won’t mend,
And time, it seems, has no true friend.

Yet deep within, a flicker remains,
A whisper of hope beneath the pains.
She reaches out, though fingers tremble,
Yearning for a chance, for hearts to resemble.

“Forgive me, darling, for the choices I made,
For the nights I drank, for the love betrayed.
I can’t change the past, but I’m here today,
To fight for you, to find a way.”

Though fate has dealt a heavy hand,
She longs to rise, to take a stand.
For in her heart, the love still glows,
A mother’s wish, a chance to grow.

And as the battle rages on,
She dreams of days when love is drawn.
For healing starts with honest tears,
And in the dark, she fights her fears.

Reviews

[Richard🖌]

Warmest greetings, Elnnes 🌾

I wish you a joyful welcome to the Writers' Café … I hope you'll enjoy it here, read and review many others' writings, make many friends, and develop a large fan following.
It is nice to meet a poetess(?)/poet(?) who composes in traditional form and rhyme, as this seems to be a fading art in many of today's poetry venues.
You skillfully recount the sorrowfully poignant tale of a regretful mother's heart whose life has been tainted by the loss of a son and isolation from a beloved daughter, while embraced by the wicked arms of an alcoholic addiction that overflows into her victimized family's life. Will the ensuing rift ever be mended? One can only hope and pray for a happy ending.

Your story poem's vivid reality touched my heart ever-so tenderly with deep compassion and empathy for both mother, daughter, and lost son … but, does well-rendered poetry not do this to its deeply stricken readers? Excellent poeting on all levels!
Beautifully flowing lines highlight this piece, with spot-on a-b-a-b rhymes, and a dancing rhythm to capture and hold the reader's attention from beginning to end … one can tell this is not your first poetic rodeo.

A wee few helpful hints to consider (meaningless "the" words throughout could be omitted for flow or replaced with words of stronger poetic expression).
1. V6L2: For the family she shattered, love overthrown. (omit "the" before "love")
2. V7L2: Wishing for solace, to take back blame. (omit "the" before "blame")
3. V8L2: A whisper of hope beneath dire pains. (replace "the" with a meaningful word)
4. V8L4: Yearning for a chance, for hearts to reassemble. (edit "resemble" to "reassemble")
5. V10L3: For in her heart, love still glows, (omit "the" before "love")
6. V10L4: A mother’s wish, a chance that grows. (edit "to" to "that" and "grow" to "grows)

It warms a poetry teacher's heart to read such splendidly composed poetic writing … thank you ever-so gratefully, Elnnes 🙏

Happy Autumn to thee 'n thine! ⁓ Richard 🍂

[PS: Read 'n review a couple'a mine, and we'll become friends] : )

[Nessa]

Dear Richard,

Thank you for your warm welcome to the Writers' Café! Your kind words wrap around my heart like a cozy autumn breeze. I’m truly touched by your reflection on my poem; knowing it resonated with you fills me with gratitude.

Your insightful suggestions are like golden leaves falling gently to the ground, and I will cherish them as I continue to weave my words. I look forward to exploring your poetry and sharing this creative journey together.

Wishing you a delightful autumn filled with inspiration!

With warm regards,
Elnnes

[Ern M. Yoshimoto]

a heart-wrenching depiction of alcoholism, which also runs in my family. it is devastating, but there is hope towards the end. also, your control over the words, the way it rhymes consistently, seems to hint that the narrator has some control -- if not over the situation, then how they feel about the situation. while poems about addiction are usually written in free verse, which reflects the disarray an addict feels, this rhyming scheme seems to urge the reader to get back in charge of the situation and find hope in the darkest corners.

[red93]

Beautiful Piece. Alcohol is the real enemy, but Governments will not acknowledge this for their own devious reasons. Excellent ✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

[Nessa]

I strongly agree with you, hopefully one day things will change. Thank you for you review, appreciate it! Have a blessed day

[red93]

✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

[Dave W.]

I really feel for the mother in this, so many mistakes made and regrets had. The line "But broken trust, like glass, won’t mend, and time, it seems, has no true friend.", really touched me. Good poem.

[Nessa]

Thank you, Dave! I appreciate your thoughtful reflection on the poem. The emotions of regret and broken trust are powerful, and I'm glad that line resonated with you. Your feedback means a lot to me!

Best,
Elnnes