What Waits Beneath

scary in a few words

Daniel woke to a suffocating cold and the stench of rotting meat. His old farmhouse groaned under the weight of a storm outside, but the sound he heard was closer�"wet, slithering noises creeping from under his bed. Paralyzed, he glanced down, where a shadow writhed, fleshy and wrong. A single skeletal hand slid out first, its fingers too long, the skin peeling, revealing raw, glistening muscle beneath. The hand gripped the edge of the bed, bending back as if breaking, the knuckles crackling and snapping as it clawed for leverage.

A face slowly emerged - sunken eyes that bled thick, black tears staining its hollow cheeks. The eyes met his, and it grinned�"a mouth stretched wider than any human jaw, filled with shattered teeth, blood-soaked gums, and a rancid tongue twitching like a snake. The creature’s head and neck twisting grotesquely as it slowly pulled itself out from under his bed, its decaying body folding and unfolding. Something inhuman, too large to fit in the cramped space.

It dragged its twisted torso across the floor, the skin sagging from its bones, scraping along like leather on broken glass. Daniel’s heart hammered as he tried to scream, but no sound escaped; his body was frozen, consumed by suffocating dread.

The creature reached the edge of his bed, one clawed finger stretching toward his face, a nail peeling backward with a sickening crack. It leaned close, its breath a nauseating fog of decay, and whispered in a voice like dry leaves ripping, "I’m what waits beneath."

Suddenly, the darkness swallowed everything. When his wife found him in the morning, Daniel was cold, his mouth stretched in a silent scream, eyes staring into nothingness. Underneath the bed lay only a smear of blood and a whisper of breath.

Author's Note

assignment - convey scary in 300 words or less. didn't concern myself too much with grammar, just the imagery.

Reviews

[Mako Silverfire]

Your imagery was very descriptive, it was like something Freddy Kruger would do.

[Ellsworth]

Ah Thank you. He is one of my favorite characters!

[Ern M. Yoshimoto]

this is a great stand-alone "short-short" (i don't think that's an english word) but i would love it if you expand it into a longer work. the monster was extremely well portrayed. and i loved how you played with the senses: sight, sound, smell, texture. it's extremely challenging with such a word limit, but this short work shows you have grasped prose and narrative structure. i hope to see you again.

[Ellsworth]

Thank you for reviewing. Yeah, I am not sure what I will do with this- lots of possibilities to expand for sure