The Imposter at Deaths Door

My nan she started forgetting

This disease it had no cure

Now so many years later

My nan is at Deaths Door

 

She wasn't my nan, not really

My nan she never swore

This lady is an imposter

The one that's at Deaths Door

 

She's got my nans face, this lady

The one I used to adore

but she's changed her completely

the imposter at Deaths Door

 

This disease has caused conflict

Her mind is now at war

She has forgotten everything

The lady at Deaths Door

 

Could she be my nan?

This disease has made me unsure

I guess I will never know

If its my nan that's at Deaths Door

Author's Note

I haven't posted in a while, nothing really came to me so I didn't just want to write a load of crap, so review, comment and everything!
thanks guys!

Reviews

[unsavable_soul]

Exceptional Oh, Hey,
Very nice ideas conveyed in this, If your goal was to leave your reader as lost in thought and feeling as the "I" in your piece must be; I say success is what you have a achieved. I lost my grandmother to cancer when I was younger, it started at her lungs and metastasis to her brain. She got more and more mentally young, then it was like really bad Alzheimer's and she passed. I wasn't sure what exactly had happened to the beautiful Woman who inspired me in art of any kind in the first place. I apologize I ramble on.

My point to all that was I found your piece personal for me and that it can only assume it was in some sense for you. Therefore I found this very crafty and emotional poetry. Please read request me in the future as I find it hard with things I have going on to get around to viewing new works of my news feed. Sorry for this, it seems to be often my loss.
Sincerely
Christopher

[oh,hey.]

I guess the emotion of the time reflected in the piece, thanks for reviewing!

[unsavable_soul]

If I failed in some sense what you were looking for in a review please let me know, I hope I conveyed my appreciation of this art.
Chris

[Russell Munroe]

Well done oh hey!

I like your structure with this. Although it shifts throughout, the rhyme pattern is great...with a pattern of finality.

Not sure if it was intentional... it works here that punctuation is absent save for the question:

"Could she be my nan?"

I am not aware of anyone who experienced dementia in my family. My paternal grandfafther experienced Alzheimer's in his last years. From what I experienced with him, I do not recall that he had the sort of intensity that you evoke here (at least not that I witnessed).

[OBWhiteHawk]

Yeah. To me I see this as being how my own nana changed so much when she was dying. How much she changed until she was truly not herself anymore. Good work.

[Jayden Ireton]

This is a great piece. I enjoy the rhyming. It brings out emotion as everyone knows someone who has been affected by a disease.

[T. Greyman]

Wow, very powerful. I can definitely feel the grief for your nan and the anger towards the disease through this. Very good work, oh,hey. I'm glad you send the read requests!

[oh,hey.]

thankyou!

[CRAIG A. THOMSON]

You have portrayed the ravages of this horrible disease perfectly.
Very moving, very sad and brilliant!

[oh,hey.]

thankyou so much

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

An apt write, indeed. Dementia...so sad. I've seen it happen to loved ones and to the loved ones of loved ones, and it is not a good place to be. I've often wondered if in the end things like this happen so that the living have an easier time letting go. When my grandmother had her stroke, she became a different person...I love her dearly still, of course, but she is not the gran that I once knew. When she passes, will that be helpful...I don't know. Well done, write. Made me think.

[oh,hey.]

thankyou

[Frankie]

I really enjoyed this poem it is very profound and emotional. I like your pattern and rhyme scheme. You put such a difficult ordeal to have to go through into such beautiful words.

[oh,hey.]

thankyou, I guess everything has a beauty of some sorts

[Leslie Philibert]

a fine poem. emotional, honest and well written. Maybe work on the second line, cure and door hang a bit, but apart from that this works well, good job

[oh,hey.]

thankyou

[Robert James Parfett]

A very emotional tale of a horrible disease. I haven't had any direct contact with anyone with Alzheimers, but I can imagine it to be very sad for all loved ones. If this is what you come up with when you don't have any ideas I can't wait for your creations when you are inspired!

[oh,hey.]

thankyou! hahhaah!

[Dayran]

Good one hey. Its reminiscent of change ... its cause, the effect on the experiencer and the viewer. It also speaks of our denial of death. Well done and with a great rhythm.

[oh,hey.]

thankyou:)