Decrepit Rain

Rain can become decrepit life.

Slick, ice rain hits your cheek

Heavy raindrops hit the lily petals in the pond where you lay

Dark grey consumes your bones to ash as you weep

Your eyelids flood so weak

The water where you lay sways as you pray

You pray to something that hath not cease.

 

Dew drops sit fresh on your collar bone

Your limbs float bloodless and sore

Dark grey turns you to stone

Complexion so hard and cold; your porcelain ivory seems no more.

 

You float decrepit in a sea of rain dropped tears

Salted and bitter, it soaks your skin

Your eyelids flood no more; no more does your pain sear

You sink so still in a pond of rain.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

I enjoyed the powerful description in the poem. The strong statements create vision of rain and thoughts.
"Dark grey turns you to stone
Complexion so hard and cold; your porcelain ivory seems no more."
A strong ending to a outstanding poem.
Coyote

[Deandra Dawn]

You are very talented...I love this one...Keep it up, seriously...don't let your talent waste away...you really have something special :)

[Lunny]

very good ^^

very nicely written, i like this write

[khalid]

i liked the natural images, i liked how you have written this poem. i just wonder, you are just 15 and you are writing nice poem like this, how will it be after some few years?

[The Other Name]

Very beautiful imagery, and I can't help but be astounded by the... vividly disturbing the scene is to me, none the less it is captivating to mind and soul

Very good.